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Sunday Story…Won’t you do right?
Everybody wants to do the right thing. No one wants to do the wrong thing. But it seems there is little reward for doing the right thing. We even have all these little sayings about it…”no good deed goes unpunished” is one that comes to mind. What??? Who decided that one? We have all heard it but do you really think it to be true? And if so, why would any of us do a good deed? I mean I may choose a certain amount of abnegation in my life but I am not sure I really want to be punished for doing nice things.
Recently a very good friend was lamenting the fact that she seems to be doing the “right” things yet she keeps getting handed the short end of the stick. Actually she said she keeps getting screwed every time she does what she thinks is the “right” thing. We all have heard of whistle blowers who end up fired or ostracized or even worse after they tell the world about some wrong doing. How in the world does this work out? I mean shouldn’t I be rewarded by doing the “right“ thing?
Weeeeelll, yes you should be rewarded. But why are you doing the right thing you are doing? Are you doing it for the reward? Are you doing the right thing because you think it’s the right thing and it’s easier/better/safer than doing any other thing? Are you staking out some kind of moral campsite where you get to hold yourself up as some sort of saint or martyr that we will all kneel at your lotus feet in wonder at your virtuous stands?
Then again, who decided the thing you are doing is, in fact, the right thing? Are there some moral absolutes that will always be right (or wrong)? Maybe you are the arbiter of all things moral…the right/wrong decider. Then you get to tell the rest of us when we are off track or that we should be doing some other thing that would more closely approximate the right thing. Or maybe your moral compass is decided by someone else…some big organization or some Grand Poobah who has the “right“ lineage and is transmitting the “right” wisdom from some moral high ground (which none of us regular people could ever hope to understand.)
Let’s be honest here…we all know what the right thing is most of the time. And most of us are doing the right thing most of the time. What about in the face of pain and suffering? What about in the face of no reward? What about when we know that the right thing is going to cost us dearly…our job, our love, the respect of others? What then? Are you willing to do the right thing because it is the right thing? Not for reward, not for taking the moral high ground, but because it is very simply the RIGHT thing to do. Are you willing to be stoned, crucified, ridiculed, ruined and laughed at because you did the right thing? There is no crown in heaven waiting for you. There is no karmic retribution that is going to take place striking down the evil doers and finger pointers. No, you may be alone in the wilderness struggling with your own conscience wondering why you got punished for doing the right thing.
Wait…maybe you won’t have to wonder about that punishment. Maybe doing the right thing is a reward in and of itself. Maybe, just maybe, your heart will tell you what the right thing is to do, not some high and mighty. And maybe when you do the right thing your heart will sing with the courage you just had. Folks this is not brain surgery. But many of us have had our moral compass removed through the slings and arrows life has been throwing at us. We have become jaded and cynical…”no good deed goes unpunished”…not in my world, not on my watch. I celebrate you doing the right thing…standing against injustice, defending the weak, the poor, and the disenfranchised. I celebrate you when you decide you are worth the effort it may take to stand up and be counted as a person of character and ethics, not just some caricature spewing platitudes about truth, justice and the American way.
Courage is often defined as facing your fear and going ahead anyway….Are you afraid of doing the right thing? Does your heart tell you it is the right thing? Have you really explored all the options? Completely, honestly and openly explored all the other choices to make sure you are on the path of harmony and balance? If so then go ahead and jump. Do the right thing. Just do it.
Namaste
John “Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
Follow me at:
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Blog Spots…John Mariotti
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Showing posts with label Transformation. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Transformation. Show all posts
Saturday, May 9, 2009
Saturday, May 2, 2009
Sunday Story…Love the one you’re with
Not so many years ago in nearby places there was a hit song that went like this…”If you can’t be with the one you love, Love the one you’re with.” Now for most of my life I have interpreted the lyrics of this song as an anthem to the free love attitudes of the late 1960’s and 1970’s. But what if there was a slightly different way to look at this? What if, just maybe, the one I am with is me? After all aren’t I the one I am with all the time?
Maybe it is time we stopped looking outside ourselves for validation, for love. And maybe we can start looking inside for that same love. If I don’t love myself why on earth would anyone else love me? If I am worthy of your love, I am worthy of loving myself. It isn’t “conceited” or egotistical --- it is just plain good sense.
All too often we want someone to love us. We want to make them love us. Or to keep loving us. You can’t do this…you cannot”make” anyone love you. You cannot make them love you the way you want to be loved. They can only love you the way they love you. You get to set limits and boundaries around your love but I do not get to say “You must love me this way and that way”. It isn’t going to work. Now, if the way you show your love is by sending your size 12 boot upside my head , well that may be outside my boundary and I will have to limit my exposure to your love. Or if your love means we spend every waking moment together that may not work either. But those limits and boundaries are about me and what I need to feel safe and yes, to feel love, from you.
But enough about you, what about me? I need to love me first. Remember our friend Bugs, head over heels in love? Self love isn’t about being out of balance, out of harmony, it’s about being completely in the moment. This really is a simple idea, yet so hard for many of us to put into practice. We have been so conditioned throughout our lives to get a reward from some on else when we do the thing they want us to do. In this case we give up some piece of ourselves in order to get love from them. The intrinsic reward for our self love is a feeling of strong self worth and knowledge that we are valuable to the flow of the universe.
Let’s be really honest shall we…I like the books I like; I like the music I like, I like the food I like. You may or may not like the things I like and I may or may not like the things you like. We will in our relationship find common ground, things we both like but I should not give up my love of Brussels sprouts just because you think they look like bird’s heads or something equally gross. Again, when I do that, when I give up the things I like, I am proving to myself that my feelings, my needs, my desires are not as important, not as valuable as yours. And that is not a recipe for long term success. That has me “falling” out of a harmonious relationship with myself. If I love myself first; then I can love you more and more completely from a position of strength and centeredness.
My reason to be no longer hinges upon you. My reason to be hinges upon myself. When I hang my self worth and my self love on my own bed post, I can be in a harmonious relationship with myself. In that harmony I become very attractive to other people seeking harmony. If misery loves company, Happiness revels in it! Stop worrying about loving someone “right.” Start loving yourself “right.” Love your self the way you want to be loved. Honor your self the way you want to honored. Eat your own cooking and you will find other people who will enjoy and honor your cooking as well.
You can always love the one you are with…and you are always with you.
Namaste
John “Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
Follow me at:
Twitter --- http://m.twitter.com/jmariotti
FaceBook --- John Mariotti
Blog Spots…John Mariotti
http://feel-good-friday.blogspot.com/
http://sunday-stories.blogspot.com/
Not so many years ago in nearby places there was a hit song that went like this…”If you can’t be with the one you love, Love the one you’re with.” Now for most of my life I have interpreted the lyrics of this song as an anthem to the free love attitudes of the late 1960’s and 1970’s. But what if there was a slightly different way to look at this? What if, just maybe, the one I am with is me? After all aren’t I the one I am with all the time?
Maybe it is time we stopped looking outside ourselves for validation, for love. And maybe we can start looking inside for that same love. If I don’t love myself why on earth would anyone else love me? If I am worthy of your love, I am worthy of loving myself. It isn’t “conceited” or egotistical --- it is just plain good sense.
All too often we want someone to love us. We want to make them love us. Or to keep loving us. You can’t do this…you cannot”make” anyone love you. You cannot make them love you the way you want to be loved. They can only love you the way they love you. You get to set limits and boundaries around your love but I do not get to say “You must love me this way and that way”. It isn’t going to work. Now, if the way you show your love is by sending your size 12 boot upside my head , well that may be outside my boundary and I will have to limit my exposure to your love. Or if your love means we spend every waking moment together that may not work either. But those limits and boundaries are about me and what I need to feel safe and yes, to feel love, from you.
But enough about you, what about me? I need to love me first. Remember our friend Bugs, head over heels in love? Self love isn’t about being out of balance, out of harmony, it’s about being completely in the moment. This really is a simple idea, yet so hard for many of us to put into practice. We have been so conditioned throughout our lives to get a reward from some on else when we do the thing they want us to do. In this case we give up some piece of ourselves in order to get love from them. The intrinsic reward for our self love is a feeling of strong self worth and knowledge that we are valuable to the flow of the universe.
Let’s be really honest shall we…I like the books I like; I like the music I like, I like the food I like. You may or may not like the things I like and I may or may not like the things you like. We will in our relationship find common ground, things we both like but I should not give up my love of Brussels sprouts just because you think they look like bird’s heads or something equally gross. Again, when I do that, when I give up the things I like, I am proving to myself that my feelings, my needs, my desires are not as important, not as valuable as yours. And that is not a recipe for long term success. That has me “falling” out of a harmonious relationship with myself. If I love myself first; then I can love you more and more completely from a position of strength and centeredness.
My reason to be no longer hinges upon you. My reason to be hinges upon myself. When I hang my self worth and my self love on my own bed post, I can be in a harmonious relationship with myself. In that harmony I become very attractive to other people seeking harmony. If misery loves company, Happiness revels in it! Stop worrying about loving someone “right.” Start loving yourself “right.” Love your self the way you want to be loved. Honor your self the way you want to honored. Eat your own cooking and you will find other people who will enjoy and honor your cooking as well.
You can always love the one you are with…and you are always with you.
Namaste
John “Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
Follow me at:
Twitter --- http://m.twitter.com/jmariotti
FaceBook --- John Mariotti
Blog Spots…John Mariotti
http://feel-good-friday.blogspot.com/
http://sunday-stories.blogspot.com/
Saturday, April 25, 2009
Sunday Story...What's Up Doc
Sunday Story…What’s up doc?
Ahhh..Bugs Bunny…that “wascally wabbit”…Bugs was always just a little bit smarter, a little funnier, a little quicker than any one of his counter parts. I always wanted to be like Bugs…chewing on my carrot, the epitome of cool…he never got rattled or excited, calm in the face of danger, and the only time I can remember seeing Bugs get a little off-center was in the presence of his “love interest”. Then he got way out of balance. He didn’t just fall in love he jumped, off the cliff in love.
I am not Bugs. I am not the “Fonz”. You know the guy who snaps his fingers and has people fawning over him. He has the coolest car, the cutest girl, and the best clothes. Not me. So what’s my point you may be asking? Bugs was Bugs. The “Fonz” was the “Fonz”. I am me, I believe in something different. Each of you believes in something different. Your beliefs might be similar but different. Even those of us who belong to this group or that group (think religion) have some differences of opinion among us. Even in those groups we don’t all believe the same thing. And we may agree on many things but disagree on something as basic as how we like our eggs cooked or our favorite color.
I believe what I believe. I believe you should spend some time working on the evolution of your soul. What I don’t believe is that I have the one right and true way for you to do that. Nor does anyone else hold that truth. Now if your version of heaven looks a certain way and you have to do perform certain tasks to get there then that’s what you should do if you want to get to your heaven. I would say, however, that whatever those requirements are that you will be evolving your soul in some fashion.
I don’t know everything about every religious path in the world but what I know about the ones I do know about, they all require us to live lives of purpose and harmony, in harmony with our beliefs. This harmony contributes to our well being, to our feeling s of happiness and contentment. When I begin to act out of harmony with my beliefs, things will take a turn in another direction.
The universe responds to my energetic signature. When I am in harmony my signature moves in accordance with the flow of energy of the universe. When I am doing things that are not in harmony with my beliefs the universe will start trying to correct me. I may see a drop in income, lose a love, get sick, and find my way in to a car accident. These are all ways the universe tells us we are out of balance, out of harmony.
When that happens, the sooner I get the message that I am in an attitude of discord, the sooner I can correct it and the less painful the message will be. Because the messages will continue until I either get back into harmony, one way or the other. And the messages will get more and more strident, louder, and more painful. You ignore these messages at your own peril.
Our friend Bugs was in harmony. Until he dove into love. Then his previous “cool quotient” disappeared. He jumped out of harmony and into discord. Rather than diving head first Bugs should maintain his harmonic cool to get the kind of relationship he really wants. So should we all. Harmony with the flow of the universe will allow us to be in love each moment with each moment. Here, Now.
We are not talking balance here. Balance is not moving, it is static…think of the old time scales….equal amount of weight on each side and nothing is moving. In harmony I am moving with the flow of the universe. Whether I am in love or moving to a new place I want to stay in harmony with the flow of the universe. I don’t want a balanced life, I want a harmonious one. A life that is constantly moving toward something greater. Moving to a transformation into something. I have been many things in my life, Father, Son, Brother, Friend, Rancher, Deputy, Stock broker, Martial Artist. I will be many, many ,more before I am done. But each one had to be in harmony with whom and with what I was at the time.
Look around you. Are you in harmony? Or are you moving from one calamity, one train wreck to another? And wondering why “this stuff” always happens to you? Stop wondering and start listening. The rocks are speaking to you and you aren’t listening. The discord has to come out somewhere. Or you get to get back into harmony. And then things will start to fit together a little tighter. Then you can be like Bugs…super cool, sitting around chewing a carrot, completely at peace and in harmony with the universe…
What’s up Doc?
Ahhh..Bugs Bunny…that “wascally wabbit”…Bugs was always just a little bit smarter, a little funnier, a little quicker than any one of his counter parts. I always wanted to be like Bugs…chewing on my carrot, the epitome of cool…he never got rattled or excited, calm in the face of danger, and the only time I can remember seeing Bugs get a little off-center was in the presence of his “love interest”. Then he got way out of balance. He didn’t just fall in love he jumped, off the cliff in love.
I am not Bugs. I am not the “Fonz”. You know the guy who snaps his fingers and has people fawning over him. He has the coolest car, the cutest girl, and the best clothes. Not me. So what’s my point you may be asking? Bugs was Bugs. The “Fonz” was the “Fonz”. I am me, I believe in something different. Each of you believes in something different. Your beliefs might be similar but different. Even those of us who belong to this group or that group (think religion) have some differences of opinion among us. Even in those groups we don’t all believe the same thing. And we may agree on many things but disagree on something as basic as how we like our eggs cooked or our favorite color.
I believe what I believe. I believe you should spend some time working on the evolution of your soul. What I don’t believe is that I have the one right and true way for you to do that. Nor does anyone else hold that truth. Now if your version of heaven looks a certain way and you have to do perform certain tasks to get there then that’s what you should do if you want to get to your heaven. I would say, however, that whatever those requirements are that you will be evolving your soul in some fashion.
I don’t know everything about every religious path in the world but what I know about the ones I do know about, they all require us to live lives of purpose and harmony, in harmony with our beliefs. This harmony contributes to our well being, to our feeling s of happiness and contentment. When I begin to act out of harmony with my beliefs, things will take a turn in another direction.
The universe responds to my energetic signature. When I am in harmony my signature moves in accordance with the flow of energy of the universe. When I am doing things that are not in harmony with my beliefs the universe will start trying to correct me. I may see a drop in income, lose a love, get sick, and find my way in to a car accident. These are all ways the universe tells us we are out of balance, out of harmony.
When that happens, the sooner I get the message that I am in an attitude of discord, the sooner I can correct it and the less painful the message will be. Because the messages will continue until I either get back into harmony, one way or the other. And the messages will get more and more strident, louder, and more painful. You ignore these messages at your own peril.
Our friend Bugs was in harmony. Until he dove into love. Then his previous “cool quotient” disappeared. He jumped out of harmony and into discord. Rather than diving head first Bugs should maintain his harmonic cool to get the kind of relationship he really wants. So should we all. Harmony with the flow of the universe will allow us to be in love each moment with each moment. Here, Now.
We are not talking balance here. Balance is not moving, it is static…think of the old time scales….equal amount of weight on each side and nothing is moving. In harmony I am moving with the flow of the universe. Whether I am in love or moving to a new place I want to stay in harmony with the flow of the universe. I don’t want a balanced life, I want a harmonious one. A life that is constantly moving toward something greater. Moving to a transformation into something. I have been many things in my life, Father, Son, Brother, Friend, Rancher, Deputy, Stock broker, Martial Artist. I will be many, many ,more before I am done. But each one had to be in harmony with whom and with what I was at the time.
Look around you. Are you in harmony? Or are you moving from one calamity, one train wreck to another? And wondering why “this stuff” always happens to you? Stop wondering and start listening. The rocks are speaking to you and you aren’t listening. The discord has to come out somewhere. Or you get to get back into harmony. And then things will start to fit together a little tighter. Then you can be like Bugs…super cool, sitting around chewing a carrot, completely at peace and in harmony with the universe…
What’s up Doc?
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Sunday Story...Cleaning house
Sunday Story…Cleaning House
It is that time of year. The time when we start opening windows, cleaning the closets, and generally rebirthing our lives. It is spring. The time of renewal. The time when life starts anew and we can look forward to warmth and sun. Many of us will spend time cleaning our homes, washing the winter’s dirt off and generally getting in touch with the growing side of life. I love a fresh spring breeze blowing through the house, clothes dried on the outside line, and a feeling of renewal surging inside me.
There are some other places that need some sweeping out as well. Let’s start with your insides. Yes, your insides. Your liver, your kidneys, your colon, and all the rest need to be cleaned up and restarted. As we live our bodies accumulate waste and toxins in various places…liver, kidneys, and colon just for starters. A “cleanse” is designed to help flush out excess waste and de-toxify various body organs. Think of it like hitting the re-set button for your body or a spring cleaning for your body. Finding a good quality cleanse program to pull all that accumulated waste out of the organs and pipes will do wonders for your skin, hair, nails, and your mental outlook. You will lose some excess weight, some inches off your belly, and improve the way you feel about yourself. Do not go for the quick fix on this one…you know… the three day take some pills and see what happens cleanse. This will not create the healthy habits we need to sustain a healthy regimen. It takes 21 days to create new habits. It takes 21 days to replace bad habits with good ones. It takes 21 days to get all the sugar, flour and junk out of your system. There is no short cut to optimum health.
Another place to look at a little spring cleaning is your mind. What…a mental cleanse? How do you do that? A friend of mine recently took a red pen to a newspaper to highlight the negative news, a yellow pen for neutral and a blue pen for the good news. 60% of the articles were red and only 15% were green! We are surrounded by negativity in the news media and in television programming. We grab some people and put them in weird situations and then watch them and their relationships fall apart and call it reality TV. I spend a fair amount of time with children and I have yet to have one of them tell me that he or she wanted to be a couch potato when they grow up. A Doctor, a Lawyer, An Astronaut, or the President, yes, but never a couch potato. So what are you going to do to clean up your mind, how to rid it of negativity and mediocrity? Start with a cleanse of mass media…that’s right turn off the TV, stop reading the newspaper, listening to talk radio. Turn it off for 21 days. And in that 21 days replace the TV and it’s negativity with positive messages. Positive messages from books from Stephen Covey, Maxwell Maltz, Napoleon Hill, Dale Carnegie, Joel; Osteen, Anthony Robbins, Bob Proctor, Eckhardt Tolle, James Arthur Ray just to name a few. You could listen to many of these books on CD (or tape) in your car on the way to wherever you are going. Imagine what it would be like to fill your mind with positive messages throughout the day instead of drivel about things you cannot do one thing about. After all, the only thing you can transform is yourself not me not the economy, not your boss or your spouse. 21 days of no TV. Sit and talk to your loved ones. Better yet, sit and listen, really listen to your loved ones.
Do we dare talk about your soul? How about a little soul cleanse? Another one that is not so easy to look at. How will we scrub some of the debris that we have been carrying around for these years? We have mentioned this before. Inspect the stories you are telling yourself. How are they serving you? Spend 15 minutes a day sitting in silence. Just sitting and breathing. When a thought comes up, recognize it, wave at it even and then say to yourself, “thought”, and go back to breathing. How long? 15 minutes a day for 21 days will have it be a habit. Meditation is listening; listening to your breath, listening to the rocks move, linking your breath to the emptiness that surrounds us. Then add prayer. Prayer is speaking; speaking your intention into the world. Whether you pray to a supreme being or a divine source, or you just speak your intention and express your gratitude. Again in 21 days your daily prayers will become a good habit that feeds your soul.
Body, mind, and soul all working together. A beautiful thing to behold. When our thoughts our deeds and our emotions are all in harmony, all working together we can be assured of a successful life. Our loved ones will be better looking and our children well behaved (well…I might be over the top here). Restore yourself in the spring just like your lawn, your house, and your garden. Spend the time getting right with yourself…clean your body, mind and soul. You will be amazed at the results. And if not…well, you can always go back to doing what you were doing before right?
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
Follow my blog at http://sunday-stories.blogspot.com/
Twitter me at: http://twitter.com/jmariotti
Facebook: John Mariotti
It is that time of year. The time when we start opening windows, cleaning the closets, and generally rebirthing our lives. It is spring. The time of renewal. The time when life starts anew and we can look forward to warmth and sun. Many of us will spend time cleaning our homes, washing the winter’s dirt off and generally getting in touch with the growing side of life. I love a fresh spring breeze blowing through the house, clothes dried on the outside line, and a feeling of renewal surging inside me.
There are some other places that need some sweeping out as well. Let’s start with your insides. Yes, your insides. Your liver, your kidneys, your colon, and all the rest need to be cleaned up and restarted. As we live our bodies accumulate waste and toxins in various places…liver, kidneys, and colon just for starters. A “cleanse” is designed to help flush out excess waste and de-toxify various body organs. Think of it like hitting the re-set button for your body or a spring cleaning for your body. Finding a good quality cleanse program to pull all that accumulated waste out of the organs and pipes will do wonders for your skin, hair, nails, and your mental outlook. You will lose some excess weight, some inches off your belly, and improve the way you feel about yourself. Do not go for the quick fix on this one…you know… the three day take some pills and see what happens cleanse. This will not create the healthy habits we need to sustain a healthy regimen. It takes 21 days to create new habits. It takes 21 days to replace bad habits with good ones. It takes 21 days to get all the sugar, flour and junk out of your system. There is no short cut to optimum health.
Another place to look at a little spring cleaning is your mind. What…a mental cleanse? How do you do that? A friend of mine recently took a red pen to a newspaper to highlight the negative news, a yellow pen for neutral and a blue pen for the good news. 60% of the articles were red and only 15% were green! We are surrounded by negativity in the news media and in television programming. We grab some people and put them in weird situations and then watch them and their relationships fall apart and call it reality TV. I spend a fair amount of time with children and I have yet to have one of them tell me that he or she wanted to be a couch potato when they grow up. A Doctor, a Lawyer, An Astronaut, or the President, yes, but never a couch potato. So what are you going to do to clean up your mind, how to rid it of negativity and mediocrity? Start with a cleanse of mass media…that’s right turn off the TV, stop reading the newspaper, listening to talk radio. Turn it off for 21 days. And in that 21 days replace the TV and it’s negativity with positive messages. Positive messages from books from Stephen Covey, Maxwell Maltz, Napoleon Hill, Dale Carnegie, Joel; Osteen, Anthony Robbins, Bob Proctor, Eckhardt Tolle, James Arthur Ray just to name a few. You could listen to many of these books on CD (or tape) in your car on the way to wherever you are going. Imagine what it would be like to fill your mind with positive messages throughout the day instead of drivel about things you cannot do one thing about. After all, the only thing you can transform is yourself not me not the economy, not your boss or your spouse. 21 days of no TV. Sit and talk to your loved ones. Better yet, sit and listen, really listen to your loved ones.
Do we dare talk about your soul? How about a little soul cleanse? Another one that is not so easy to look at. How will we scrub some of the debris that we have been carrying around for these years? We have mentioned this before. Inspect the stories you are telling yourself. How are they serving you? Spend 15 minutes a day sitting in silence. Just sitting and breathing. When a thought comes up, recognize it, wave at it even and then say to yourself, “thought”, and go back to breathing. How long? 15 minutes a day for 21 days will have it be a habit. Meditation is listening; listening to your breath, listening to the rocks move, linking your breath to the emptiness that surrounds us. Then add prayer. Prayer is speaking; speaking your intention into the world. Whether you pray to a supreme being or a divine source, or you just speak your intention and express your gratitude. Again in 21 days your daily prayers will become a good habit that feeds your soul.
Body, mind, and soul all working together. A beautiful thing to behold. When our thoughts our deeds and our emotions are all in harmony, all working together we can be assured of a successful life. Our loved ones will be better looking and our children well behaved (well…I might be over the top here). Restore yourself in the spring just like your lawn, your house, and your garden. Spend the time getting right with yourself…clean your body, mind and soul. You will be amazed at the results. And if not…well, you can always go back to doing what you were doing before right?
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
Follow my blog at http://sunday-stories.blogspot.com/
Twitter me at: http://twitter.com/jmariotti
Facebook: John Mariotti
Saturday, April 4, 2009
Sunday Story...live like a ?
Sunday Story…live like a?
One of the questions I frequently ask my students goes like this:
…If you knew on Saturday that you were going to be thrown in the middle of the ocean with no hope of rescue for 3 hours and you did NOT know how to swim today, how much would swim lessons be worth to you today? AND how hard would you apply yourself to those lessons? The answer is pretty obvious isn’t it? Those lessons would be invaluable and you would be the most attentive student on the planet. Anyone know where I am going with this?
Sure you should apply yourself to your lessons…martial arts, school, work. Any learning environment is providing lessons to you all the time. Are you paying attention to those lessons like your life depends on it? If you knew the punch you were learning or the choke would save your life tomorrow would you practice it differently? If the report you are writing right now would earn you a million dollars next month would you write it differently? Are you doing million dollar work? Will your training today save your life tomorrow?
This is a pretty obvious question and answer. Of course we would train differently if we knew our life depended on it today or there was a million dollars on the line tomorrow. This is why we look at champion fights or championship games the way we do…at the end the victor gets bragging rights, the rings, the checks, and the adulation. So did those champions just get lucky and show up that day for the big game? Of course, not they trained for years before that game or that match.
Obviously, you should train hard, work hard, and live like a champion. BUT (here it comes) what about all those lessons and teachings that are not so obvious. It’s easy to apply yourself to the things you want to do. What are you doing about the OTHER things? Things like looking at the patterns of your life, the stuff that keeps coming up, the situations that occur over and over again. The stuff in your relationships that happen time after time…maybe you are constantly having drama around money with your significant other, children, and boss. Why is that? What are you doing to cause that? What do you need to heal to move on? Are you even looking and listening to that lesson? Are you willing to attack those lessons like your life depends on it? Because it does you know. The stress caused by these lessons occurring time after time after time is killing you, robbing you of optimum health and fitness.
The lessons the universe is serving up are important to the health and healing of your soul. Ask yourself why do the same things keep happening to me? What am I meant to learn from this situation? Train your focus on the why of it. AND then start contemplating on what you need to do differently to create a different outcome. Because if you don’t do something differently you will just get more of what you already have. If your life is full of challenges about money, start looking at your belief system about money. Don’t bemoan the fact that every time you get some money it disappears and it isn’t your fault. Maybe your relationships are full of drama and trauma. Let’s look at your part in those dramas and find what YOU are doing to call those energies forward. Because your life is about you, it is your movie and you are the main character.
Start playing full out my friends. Not just on the training mat. Not just in the class room. Not just on the job. But in the interior of your life. Start playing full out on the field of your soul. What price is your happiness, what price is the evolution of your soul? Because it isn’t going to just happen. Just like you are not just going to happen to run a marathon or earn your doctorate. This is part of the Master’s journey, the Master’s work…it isn’t just physical fitness, or mental acuity, or emotional harmony although it is all of those things. It is about creating a soul’s journey that will leave your next journey clear of obstacles. And the only way you are going to get on that road is by looking very closely at your life. Clearly inspect the things, situations, and people that keep ‘popping” up. Is the same person saying the same things year after year? Don’t you think you should do something about that? Maybe if you catch the signs early enough you can save yourself some heartache.
Let’s apply the same focus we do to our studies, our training, our work, our play, our friends, and our environments to the landscape of our souls. Spend some time meditating (listening), spend some time praying (speaking), but most of all spend some time inspecting all the canyons, streams, forests and deserts of your interior being. If you don’t like what it looks like learn some lessons. And start working on some solutions that will yield different results than the ones you already got. Talk to someone if need be. Someone who is not attached to the outcome. Get out of your little box and start playing like your life and a million bucks were on the line. Because just maybe they are.
So…how are you living your life? Are you living like a champion, like a Buddha, like a Christ? Just wondering you know.
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
Follow my blog at http://sunday-stories.blogspot.com/
Twitter me at: http://twitter.com/jmariotti
Facebook: John Mariotti
One of the questions I frequently ask my students goes like this:
…If you knew on Saturday that you were going to be thrown in the middle of the ocean with no hope of rescue for 3 hours and you did NOT know how to swim today, how much would swim lessons be worth to you today? AND how hard would you apply yourself to those lessons? The answer is pretty obvious isn’t it? Those lessons would be invaluable and you would be the most attentive student on the planet. Anyone know where I am going with this?
Sure you should apply yourself to your lessons…martial arts, school, work. Any learning environment is providing lessons to you all the time. Are you paying attention to those lessons like your life depends on it? If you knew the punch you were learning or the choke would save your life tomorrow would you practice it differently? If the report you are writing right now would earn you a million dollars next month would you write it differently? Are you doing million dollar work? Will your training today save your life tomorrow?
This is a pretty obvious question and answer. Of course we would train differently if we knew our life depended on it today or there was a million dollars on the line tomorrow. This is why we look at champion fights or championship games the way we do…at the end the victor gets bragging rights, the rings, the checks, and the adulation. So did those champions just get lucky and show up that day for the big game? Of course, not they trained for years before that game or that match.
Obviously, you should train hard, work hard, and live like a champion. BUT (here it comes) what about all those lessons and teachings that are not so obvious. It’s easy to apply yourself to the things you want to do. What are you doing about the OTHER things? Things like looking at the patterns of your life, the stuff that keeps coming up, the situations that occur over and over again. The stuff in your relationships that happen time after time…maybe you are constantly having drama around money with your significant other, children, and boss. Why is that? What are you doing to cause that? What do you need to heal to move on? Are you even looking and listening to that lesson? Are you willing to attack those lessons like your life depends on it? Because it does you know. The stress caused by these lessons occurring time after time after time is killing you, robbing you of optimum health and fitness.
The lessons the universe is serving up are important to the health and healing of your soul. Ask yourself why do the same things keep happening to me? What am I meant to learn from this situation? Train your focus on the why of it. AND then start contemplating on what you need to do differently to create a different outcome. Because if you don’t do something differently you will just get more of what you already have. If your life is full of challenges about money, start looking at your belief system about money. Don’t bemoan the fact that every time you get some money it disappears and it isn’t your fault. Maybe your relationships are full of drama and trauma. Let’s look at your part in those dramas and find what YOU are doing to call those energies forward. Because your life is about you, it is your movie and you are the main character.
Start playing full out my friends. Not just on the training mat. Not just in the class room. Not just on the job. But in the interior of your life. Start playing full out on the field of your soul. What price is your happiness, what price is the evolution of your soul? Because it isn’t going to just happen. Just like you are not just going to happen to run a marathon or earn your doctorate. This is part of the Master’s journey, the Master’s work…it isn’t just physical fitness, or mental acuity, or emotional harmony although it is all of those things. It is about creating a soul’s journey that will leave your next journey clear of obstacles. And the only way you are going to get on that road is by looking very closely at your life. Clearly inspect the things, situations, and people that keep ‘popping” up. Is the same person saying the same things year after year? Don’t you think you should do something about that? Maybe if you catch the signs early enough you can save yourself some heartache.
Let’s apply the same focus we do to our studies, our training, our work, our play, our friends, and our environments to the landscape of our souls. Spend some time meditating (listening), spend some time praying (speaking), but most of all spend some time inspecting all the canyons, streams, forests and deserts of your interior being. If you don’t like what it looks like learn some lessons. And start working on some solutions that will yield different results than the ones you already got. Talk to someone if need be. Someone who is not attached to the outcome. Get out of your little box and start playing like your life and a million bucks were on the line. Because just maybe they are.
So…how are you living your life? Are you living like a champion, like a Buddha, like a Christ? Just wondering you know.
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
Follow my blog at http://sunday-stories.blogspot.com/
Twitter me at: http://twitter.com/jmariotti
Facebook: John Mariotti
Saturday, March 28, 2009
Sunday Story...Focus, Re-Focus
Sunday Story…Focus, Re-Focus
"The world beyond will not belong to 'managers' or those who can make the numbers dance. The world will belong to passionate, driven leaders -- people who will not only have enormous amounts of energy but who can energize those whom they lead."
— Jack Welch
Businessman and CEO of General Electric
OK…Every week I sit down in front of this computer screen and these words magically appear and I send them out to all of you to read. At least that’s the way it seems most of the time. I have some idea, or some catalyst that starts the ball rolling and WHAM! the next thing I know the thing is done. I have this laser beam of focus that seems to keep me on task. But sometimes it is more difficult than others. And I think we all experience this halting step from time to time.
Maybe you are worried about your finances or your job. Maybe you are falling in love or falling out of love. Maybe the people closest to you are having difficulties with their health. Maybe you just can’t seem to get your head around what it is you are supposed to be doing.
There are a myriad of distractions in this world we live in today. Cell phones, computers, personal music devices, video games, and television just to name a few. It is so easy to get sucked into the vortex of hyper-communication and “busy-ness”. How many time have you said…”I am so busy, I barely have time to turn around” or something like that. The laundry, the dishes, the kids, the job, and the spouse, all call to us incessantly.
All of these things can make it hard to focus on what really matters. All those bells and whistles calling out, all the siren calls are pulling us in different directions. What can you do to stay true to your purpose, stay on course with your mission?
There are 4 questions I ask myself when I am doing anything:
1. How am I making a difference?
2. Is what I am doing right now on purpose?
3. Is this what I really want to do?
4. Am I following my passion?
Here are some simple tips and tricks to get you back on track (some of them obviously work since you are reading this today!):
Step away from the desk…get outside, take a brisk walk, breath some fresh air
• Get your mission statement out, go to the nearest mirror and start reading it aloud to your self
• Meditate…take 15 minutes to just sit and let your mind clear, concentrate on your breath going in and out.
• Read a short inspirational passage in your favorite book
• Get your hair shirt out and beat yourself with a stick (not really, just checking to see if you are paying attention)
• Train/exercise
• Call a friend and tell them your problem, maybe they will have a spark for you.
In the face of adversity or in the jaws of difficulty, the truly purpose driven person will find a way to fulfill their purpose, their mission. This is one of the ways we know we are on the right track. When the entire world is cracking up you can only see the mission. When the crew is mutinying and threatening to throw you overboard you find the right words to get them back on the job. When every fiber of your being is resisting and fighting, you relax, breathe, and push forward knowing the mission is right and the purpose is there to be fulfilled.
This is leadership in the new world. This is visionary, purposeful living. We are all leading, if only ourselves. So lead yourself where you want to go, not where the wind will blow you.
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
Follow my blog at http://sunday-stories.blogspot.com/
Twitter me at: http://twitter.com/jmariotti
Facebook: John Mariotti
"The world beyond will not belong to 'managers' or those who can make the numbers dance. The world will belong to passionate, driven leaders -- people who will not only have enormous amounts of energy but who can energize those whom they lead."
— Jack Welch
Businessman and CEO of General Electric
OK…Every week I sit down in front of this computer screen and these words magically appear and I send them out to all of you to read. At least that’s the way it seems most of the time. I have some idea, or some catalyst that starts the ball rolling and WHAM! the next thing I know the thing is done. I have this laser beam of focus that seems to keep me on task. But sometimes it is more difficult than others. And I think we all experience this halting step from time to time.
Maybe you are worried about your finances or your job. Maybe you are falling in love or falling out of love. Maybe the people closest to you are having difficulties with their health. Maybe you just can’t seem to get your head around what it is you are supposed to be doing.
There are a myriad of distractions in this world we live in today. Cell phones, computers, personal music devices, video games, and television just to name a few. It is so easy to get sucked into the vortex of hyper-communication and “busy-ness”. How many time have you said…”I am so busy, I barely have time to turn around” or something like that. The laundry, the dishes, the kids, the job, and the spouse, all call to us incessantly.
All of these things can make it hard to focus on what really matters. All those bells and whistles calling out, all the siren calls are pulling us in different directions. What can you do to stay true to your purpose, stay on course with your mission?
There are 4 questions I ask myself when I am doing anything:
1. How am I making a difference?
2. Is what I am doing right now on purpose?
3. Is this what I really want to do?
4. Am I following my passion?
Here are some simple tips and tricks to get you back on track (some of them obviously work since you are reading this today!):
Step away from the desk…get outside, take a brisk walk, breath some fresh air
• Get your mission statement out, go to the nearest mirror and start reading it aloud to your self
• Meditate…take 15 minutes to just sit and let your mind clear, concentrate on your breath going in and out.
• Read a short inspirational passage in your favorite book
• Get your hair shirt out and beat yourself with a stick (not really, just checking to see if you are paying attention)
• Train/exercise
• Call a friend and tell them your problem, maybe they will have a spark for you.
In the face of adversity or in the jaws of difficulty, the truly purpose driven person will find a way to fulfill their purpose, their mission. This is one of the ways we know we are on the right track. When the entire world is cracking up you can only see the mission. When the crew is mutinying and threatening to throw you overboard you find the right words to get them back on the job. When every fiber of your being is resisting and fighting, you relax, breathe, and push forward knowing the mission is right and the purpose is there to be fulfilled.
This is leadership in the new world. This is visionary, purposeful living. We are all leading, if only ourselves. So lead yourself where you want to go, not where the wind will blow you.
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
Follow my blog at http://sunday-stories.blogspot.com/
Twitter me at: http://twitter.com/jmariotti
Facebook: John Mariotti
Saturday, March 21, 2009
Sunday Story…Simple, but not so Easy
“I have the simplest of tastes. I only want the best.” Oscar Wilde
Over the last year or two I have been on a campaign to simplify my life. To create a life that has more spaciousness and abundance in it by having less stuff taking up room. And, it seems, the entire world may now be going in the same direction. So, I guess I will now take full and complete responsibility for the current economic morass we find ourselves in! See, if you would have been reading these pages closely you would have know to sell 18 months ago!
We have been living beyond our means. We have been living beyond our needs. We have been living beyond our capacity to replace what we are using up. And to make things even worse we have been doing so without intention and consciousness. Like living in some fog of consumerism where the party never ends, money flows like water and the detritus of life keeps piling up. If we said I don’t care, I am going to use all the resources I can find, I am going to create a huge mess for my children’s children’s children to clean up then OK. At least we did so consciously and with intention. But no, we just went along fat dumb and happy, in essence like some bovine chewing a cud waiting to get hit smack dab in the forehead with a hammer.
The music has shifted from “Party like a Rock Star” to “Brother can you spare a dime”. From rock and roll to dirge and the lamenting can be heard the world over. And it is all my fault. I woke up. I woke up and looked around my life and decided to put myself on a reduced consumption diet. I reduced my living quarters from 1500 sq ft. to less than 1000 sq ft and I think it is still too big. I jettisoned enough stuff to get my car into a one car garage. I boxed up and gave away decades of books and cds. I donated clothes that were unnecessary to a simpler lifestyle. I committed to buying almost nothing new and wearing what I have to the end of its life. My car has 185,000 miles on it and is 9 years old and I will not be replacing it anytime soon.
I ride my bike 5 out of 6 days to work and back. This is easier because I moved out of the outlying areas into the closer and not so urbane area in the middle of town. I don’t buy plastic bags, foil or paper towels. I recycle in a town that has no recycling and I compost everything compostable. My clothes dry on a rack and my heat is kept at a miserly 55 degrees. I feel abundant and spacious.
BUT (just a question of when for this right?), this isn’t really what this is about…to see who can live the simplest, like “no-impact” man (http://noimpactman.typepad.com/blog/2007/02/the_no_impact_e.html) in NYC who lived without electricity and stuff for a year. Nor is it about trying to return to the loin cloth and caves of our prehistoric past. Folks this is about ATTITUDE, INTENTION, and CONSCIOUSNESS. This is about waking up to the abundance of resources about us. Not the money, the, cars, the houses, the watches, the STUFF, but the people, the community, the hearts, the LOVE that surrounds us. We are rich in social capital. My heart breaks when I see people without food so I am creating a community garden project. A place where people can learn how to tend a physical garden, one that will provide a harvest of good nutritious food in return for their labor. AND a place for the garden of their soul to heal and re-connect with the cycle of life. This garden will be in my huge empty back yard. It is a gift to my community, to the people who want to be reconnected with life, who want to understand that social capital is more important than capital spending. And as each of us gives our time, energy, expertise and energy to the physical garden our own interior garden will grow and bloom and provide a bounty of soulful nutrition.
The community will be richer and more united. Not “look at those people why don’t they do something” but rather “look at those people what something can I do?” When I see the people stand in line at the food pantry, I see my neighbors who moved out at night recently. I see the parents of children I have taught and sometimes I see the children I have taught waiting in line and playing in the parking lot as well. I see an attitude of loss and shame and I am chagrined. How have I let this come to pass? Did my flagrant disregard of resources, my lust for the newest phone, the latest gadget, a new flat screen TV, and my accumulation of stuff cause me to lose sight of the truly important thing? The care and feeding of the human hearts around me is the important thing. This is where abundance and prosperity lie.
So, yes, the economic downturn, the recession, the financial catastrophe is my entire fault. I woke up from my dream and decided I didn’t want to live like that anymore. I awoke mad as hell and determined to change the world I live in, right here right now. This is simple my friends. Just wake up from your soporific existence and throw open the window and let the light and fresh air in. I am tilling the soil, shaking up the status quo so I can plant the seeds that will enrich my life, the lives of my community and the world. It is already being done by me.
When we have less, we have more. More space for spirit, more time to listen to the rocks move. More appreciation for the best things. Oscar Wilde was right…My tastes are simple. And the simpler my tastes are the easier it is to truly appreciate the best things…dust swirling in the spring sunlight, joyful laughter of children playing, and the satisfaction of living in a world of harmony and beauty.
Simple yes but not so easy.
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
Follow my blog at http://sunday-stories.blogspot.com/
Twitter me at: http://twitter.com/jmariotti
Facebook: John Mariotti
“I have the simplest of tastes. I only want the best.” Oscar Wilde
Over the last year or two I have been on a campaign to simplify my life. To create a life that has more spaciousness and abundance in it by having less stuff taking up room. And, it seems, the entire world may now be going in the same direction. So, I guess I will now take full and complete responsibility for the current economic morass we find ourselves in! See, if you would have been reading these pages closely you would have know to sell 18 months ago!
We have been living beyond our means. We have been living beyond our needs. We have been living beyond our capacity to replace what we are using up. And to make things even worse we have been doing so without intention and consciousness. Like living in some fog of consumerism where the party never ends, money flows like water and the detritus of life keeps piling up. If we said I don’t care, I am going to use all the resources I can find, I am going to create a huge mess for my children’s children’s children to clean up then OK. At least we did so consciously and with intention. But no, we just went along fat dumb and happy, in essence like some bovine chewing a cud waiting to get hit smack dab in the forehead with a hammer.
The music has shifted from “Party like a Rock Star” to “Brother can you spare a dime”. From rock and roll to dirge and the lamenting can be heard the world over. And it is all my fault. I woke up. I woke up and looked around my life and decided to put myself on a reduced consumption diet. I reduced my living quarters from 1500 sq ft. to less than 1000 sq ft and I think it is still too big. I jettisoned enough stuff to get my car into a one car garage. I boxed up and gave away decades of books and cds. I donated clothes that were unnecessary to a simpler lifestyle. I committed to buying almost nothing new and wearing what I have to the end of its life. My car has 185,000 miles on it and is 9 years old and I will not be replacing it anytime soon.
I ride my bike 5 out of 6 days to work and back. This is easier because I moved out of the outlying areas into the closer and not so urbane area in the middle of town. I don’t buy plastic bags, foil or paper towels. I recycle in a town that has no recycling and I compost everything compostable. My clothes dry on a rack and my heat is kept at a miserly 55 degrees. I feel abundant and spacious.
BUT (just a question of when for this right?), this isn’t really what this is about…to see who can live the simplest, like “no-impact” man (http://noimpactman.typepad.com/blog/2007/02/the_no_impact_e.html) in NYC who lived without electricity and stuff for a year. Nor is it about trying to return to the loin cloth and caves of our prehistoric past. Folks this is about ATTITUDE, INTENTION, and CONSCIOUSNESS. This is about waking up to the abundance of resources about us. Not the money, the, cars, the houses, the watches, the STUFF, but the people, the community, the hearts, the LOVE that surrounds us. We are rich in social capital. My heart breaks when I see people without food so I am creating a community garden project. A place where people can learn how to tend a physical garden, one that will provide a harvest of good nutritious food in return for their labor. AND a place for the garden of their soul to heal and re-connect with the cycle of life. This garden will be in my huge empty back yard. It is a gift to my community, to the people who want to be reconnected with life, who want to understand that social capital is more important than capital spending. And as each of us gives our time, energy, expertise and energy to the physical garden our own interior garden will grow and bloom and provide a bounty of soulful nutrition.
The community will be richer and more united. Not “look at those people why don’t they do something” but rather “look at those people what something can I do?” When I see the people stand in line at the food pantry, I see my neighbors who moved out at night recently. I see the parents of children I have taught and sometimes I see the children I have taught waiting in line and playing in the parking lot as well. I see an attitude of loss and shame and I am chagrined. How have I let this come to pass? Did my flagrant disregard of resources, my lust for the newest phone, the latest gadget, a new flat screen TV, and my accumulation of stuff cause me to lose sight of the truly important thing? The care and feeding of the human hearts around me is the important thing. This is where abundance and prosperity lie.
So, yes, the economic downturn, the recession, the financial catastrophe is my entire fault. I woke up from my dream and decided I didn’t want to live like that anymore. I awoke mad as hell and determined to change the world I live in, right here right now. This is simple my friends. Just wake up from your soporific existence and throw open the window and let the light and fresh air in. I am tilling the soil, shaking up the status quo so I can plant the seeds that will enrich my life, the lives of my community and the world. It is already being done by me.
When we have less, we have more. More space for spirit, more time to listen to the rocks move. More appreciation for the best things. Oscar Wilde was right…My tastes are simple. And the simpler my tastes are the easier it is to truly appreciate the best things…dust swirling in the spring sunlight, joyful laughter of children playing, and the satisfaction of living in a world of harmony and beauty.
Simple yes but not so easy.
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
Follow my blog at http://sunday-stories.blogspot.com/
Twitter me at: http://twitter.com/jmariotti
Facebook: John Mariotti
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Sunday Story…Thoughts for Food
“…It’s remarkable how much mediocrity we live with, surrounding ourselves with daily reminders that the average is the acceptable. Our world suffers from terminal normality…” Stewart Emory
Last week a friend told me about an assignment her son was asked to do for his history class. The assignment called for him to put himself in the place of a Plantation owner in the Southern USA when slavery was prevalent. It instructed him to write and explore how he would deal with the “slave problem”, how he would deal with runaways and discipline and how he could motivate them to get the most from their labor. There were several restrictions on the assignment including the one that stated freeing the slaves was not an option. Needless to say I was shocked. I am not sure how this kind of exploration serves our learning and understanding of the problem. Worse than that…thinking about how I am going to treat my slaves is just wrong. This kind of thinking can drive us right into the conceptual idea that slavery isn’t so bad. And that is a very bad thing indeed.
I teach a thing called FAST defense. In FAST defense I become the assailant, the “bad guy”. I assume the role of attacker, mugger, and rapist. I wear a suit that allows the participants to defend themselves in real time using full force techniques on a human person (me). It is dirty work for me. It pushes lots of buttons for me. Buttons of being overly aggressive and angry, buttons of doing and saying very evil and nasty things to people I may know and like. And in the “woofer” mode my job is to have you travel down the road of adrenal response. To feel in your guts that fear and energy that could cost you your life or sanity and to discover the power inside you that converts fear into power. Without the woofer you do not get adrenalized and do not discover how to turn fear into power. The woofer is acting. He is not the actual assailant, and when it is all over the woofer returns to his normal personality. But I can speak from experience that the return is not immediate. There is something that happens to you when you enter the mindset of “dirt bag”, or rapist, or just plain old bad guy. There is a residual, a left over, “the ring around the chi” that lingers around until you clear it off. When we finish FAST training I always have to take some time to cleanse myself of all the negative energy and thoughts that I have created. Putting myself in the place of a slave owner is the same exercise as “woofing” and would require cleansing after the exercise.
Why should you stay away from network news and negative information? It is not as if you are putting any emotion or energy into the news, right? Negative thoughts and information carry a lot of chi or energy in their natural state. There are concepts in the world that, by their very nature, carry so much emotion and life (or death) force that they are going to generate strong reaction in us. Murder, Slavery, Pedophilia are all actions and concepts that are hurtful to the human soul and psyche. Exploring these things can be very dangerous to your soul. Not because you are going to do them but because they have the ability to evoke very strong emotions in us in a negative sense. But we also can’t be a “polly anna” either. These things happen every day in our world and to ignore them is to condone them. But we cannot spend every waking hour putting ourselves in the shoes of the evil doers. It is not productive for our mental state of mind. There are some things that do not belong in our bodies or our minds. We need to know the dangers, we need to train to prevent the dangers from happening to us and our loved ones, and we need to understand what and how these evils occur. BUT we do not need to start thinking like the evil doers. That is a tunnel with no cheese at the end of it.
My thoughts become my reality. What I spend my time on in the interior of my mind is where I will spend my time on in the exterior of my life. If I spend my time thinking about all the bad things, the negative things going on in the world today, my mind will become polluted like a stream being constantly fed poison. It will never have a chance to cleanse itself.
We need to feed our mind like we feed our body, with good solid food. The kind of food that will empower us to become greater than we are today. There are many sources for the kind of nourishment I am talking about…for many scripture is their food, for others it is personal growth book. Spiritual literature, teaching stories, uplifting movies (Spiritual Cinema), music that messages the positive are all things that will feed your mind and your soul positively. Going to workshops to learn new skills, or to get information about your inner aspects, or to find more like minded people will all provide nutrients for your inner ecology. Meditation and prayer on a daily basis help provide the habitual framework for positive thinking and a mental outlook that goes beyond the ordinary. The habit of reading uplifting literature before going to bed will create, in your subconscious, an environment of hope and joy.
I leave you with this quote from Marianne Williamson:
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
What are you doing today to be the powerful being you are meant to be? Who says you cannot be all the things you want to be? Get out of your head and get into our heart. Into the part of you that knows, deep down, that you are meant to raise the vibration of every living thing on this planet.
Let’s start now, together, on a journey that will move mountains.
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
Join my blog at http://sunday-stories.blogspot.com or find me on Facebook. More stuff coming soon…
“…It’s remarkable how much mediocrity we live with, surrounding ourselves with daily reminders that the average is the acceptable. Our world suffers from terminal normality…” Stewart Emory
Last week a friend told me about an assignment her son was asked to do for his history class. The assignment called for him to put himself in the place of a Plantation owner in the Southern USA when slavery was prevalent. It instructed him to write and explore how he would deal with the “slave problem”, how he would deal with runaways and discipline and how he could motivate them to get the most from their labor. There were several restrictions on the assignment including the one that stated freeing the slaves was not an option. Needless to say I was shocked. I am not sure how this kind of exploration serves our learning and understanding of the problem. Worse than that…thinking about how I am going to treat my slaves is just wrong. This kind of thinking can drive us right into the conceptual idea that slavery isn’t so bad. And that is a very bad thing indeed.
I teach a thing called FAST defense. In FAST defense I become the assailant, the “bad guy”. I assume the role of attacker, mugger, and rapist. I wear a suit that allows the participants to defend themselves in real time using full force techniques on a human person (me). It is dirty work for me. It pushes lots of buttons for me. Buttons of being overly aggressive and angry, buttons of doing and saying very evil and nasty things to people I may know and like. And in the “woofer” mode my job is to have you travel down the road of adrenal response. To feel in your guts that fear and energy that could cost you your life or sanity and to discover the power inside you that converts fear into power. Without the woofer you do not get adrenalized and do not discover how to turn fear into power. The woofer is acting. He is not the actual assailant, and when it is all over the woofer returns to his normal personality. But I can speak from experience that the return is not immediate. There is something that happens to you when you enter the mindset of “dirt bag”, or rapist, or just plain old bad guy. There is a residual, a left over, “the ring around the chi” that lingers around until you clear it off. When we finish FAST training I always have to take some time to cleanse myself of all the negative energy and thoughts that I have created. Putting myself in the place of a slave owner is the same exercise as “woofing” and would require cleansing after the exercise.
Why should you stay away from network news and negative information? It is not as if you are putting any emotion or energy into the news, right? Negative thoughts and information carry a lot of chi or energy in their natural state. There are concepts in the world that, by their very nature, carry so much emotion and life (or death) force that they are going to generate strong reaction in us. Murder, Slavery, Pedophilia are all actions and concepts that are hurtful to the human soul and psyche. Exploring these things can be very dangerous to your soul. Not because you are going to do them but because they have the ability to evoke very strong emotions in us in a negative sense. But we also can’t be a “polly anna” either. These things happen every day in our world and to ignore them is to condone them. But we cannot spend every waking hour putting ourselves in the shoes of the evil doers. It is not productive for our mental state of mind. There are some things that do not belong in our bodies or our minds. We need to know the dangers, we need to train to prevent the dangers from happening to us and our loved ones, and we need to understand what and how these evils occur. BUT we do not need to start thinking like the evil doers. That is a tunnel with no cheese at the end of it.
My thoughts become my reality. What I spend my time on in the interior of my mind is where I will spend my time on in the exterior of my life. If I spend my time thinking about all the bad things, the negative things going on in the world today, my mind will become polluted like a stream being constantly fed poison. It will never have a chance to cleanse itself.
We need to feed our mind like we feed our body, with good solid food. The kind of food that will empower us to become greater than we are today. There are many sources for the kind of nourishment I am talking about…for many scripture is their food, for others it is personal growth book. Spiritual literature, teaching stories, uplifting movies (Spiritual Cinema), music that messages the positive are all things that will feed your mind and your soul positively. Going to workshops to learn new skills, or to get information about your inner aspects, or to find more like minded people will all provide nutrients for your inner ecology. Meditation and prayer on a daily basis help provide the habitual framework for positive thinking and a mental outlook that goes beyond the ordinary. The habit of reading uplifting literature before going to bed will create, in your subconscious, an environment of hope and joy.
I leave you with this quote from Marianne Williamson:
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
What are you doing today to be the powerful being you are meant to be? Who says you cannot be all the things you want to be? Get out of your head and get into our heart. Into the part of you that knows, deep down, that you are meant to raise the vibration of every living thing on this planet.
Let’s start now, together, on a journey that will move mountains.
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
Join my blog at http://sunday-stories.blogspot.com or find me on Facebook. More stuff coming soon…
Saturday, March 7, 2009
Sunday Story...Don't Should on Me
Sunday Story…Don’t Should on Me
“The most difficult battle you will ever face is the battle to be unique” James Arthur Ray
The other day a friend and I were having tea (actually carrot juice but tea sounds so much more urbane) and he expressed a concern about all the things he “should” be doing. Getting out in nature more, using cloth diapers, growing a garden all came “shoulding” out. Then I attended a talk given by a very knowledgeable Doctor about fitness and nutrition. And I got “should” on all over. This phrase we use so often is so charged with emotion that it is frightening. These 2 conversations set me to thinking about all the things I “should” be doing. And where do those things come from that I should be doing? Who says I “should” be doing those things? Because, really, if those things were all that important wouldn’t I already be doing them?
Then I start carrying around all my “shoulds” with the rest of My Stuff. This is going to require an awfully big sack after a decade or two. I might even need a hand truck or wagon or something to get it all in! I should have gone to Law School. I should have married that person. I should have taken that job, joined the Army or the Peace Corps, or written that letter. And then there are the people around me telling me about all the things I “should” be doing, or “should” have done. You should exercise more. You should eat better, meditate, and be kinder to animals. Yes you should.
But I feel so bad when I think about the things I should be doing and am not doing. I feel guilty when I don’t exercise, or when I eat food that doesn’t nourish my body the way I want to. I feel remorse when I look back and realize I should have done this or that. These feelings arise because I think some need I have is not being fulfilled. I have a need for health. When I do not exercise that need is not fulfilled. But I do exercise (OK, I don’t exercise, I train) a lot. So how is it if I miss a session I start “shoulding” all over myself. I should have exercised today. Then I start feeling badly and start using the guilt gun on myself. But I did exercise yesterday. And I can exercise tomorrow. So where does this feeling of guilt arise from. What need did I miss, because I am fulfilling my need for health already?
“Should” arises from a cognitive dissonance set up by some expectation I or someone else or society has put upon me. I have an expectation to exercise daily. When I don’t do that I am “out of integrity” with my own plan and my vision of myself. The dis-harmony that this creates is a cognitive dissonance. Think of it as one note on a piano being out of tune. Every time that key is stroked the tune sounds poorly. The more keys that are broken or out of tune the less likely it is that the tune will be harmonious and pleasant to the ear. The more often that I play the tune with broken keys the less likely I am to keep playing the piano. Or, the more often I experience the cognitive dissonance of not exercising when I planned to the more likely it is that I will stop altogether. I dislike the feelings that cognitive dissonance creates in me.
I can fix this cognitive dissonance, these broken keys, if you will. I can refocus my exercise goals. I can make a new plan that will change the dis-harmony into a melody again. The real problem arises from the vague rules or expectations our society puts upon us. This dissonance is a little harder to deal with. I should have a bigger house, a larger bank account, a newer car. Society and culture puts this out there as the one, right, and true way. I should do all these things to be truly productive or successful. Says who? When society “shoulds” on me I can take it to heart and try to create harmony that has my goals and society’s perceived needs in alignment with one another. Or maybe I should play a different tune that doesn’t need to use those broken keys. Maybe I can create a new music that will be in harmony with the world I want to live in, a world where the “shoulds" of society aren’t getting smeared all over me (go here to see what these people are doing about their “shoulds”… http://www.dailygood.org/more.php?n=3619)
This requires me to re-write my programming. This re-creation of what I want to do, what I want my world to look like will require work on my part. It is easy to do what society says I “should” do…get married, have a career, retire, watch the latest reality TV show, and get the latest gadget. It is a little more challenging to discover your purpose and then live every day into the vision of fulfilling your purpose. Discovering what I am meant to do, who the real me is supposed to be is work boys and girls. The struggle to be unique, to be truly how I am not who I “should” be is worthy of our trip here. Or as e. e. cummings said…”It takes courage to grow up and turn out to be who you really are.”
So…ready to grow up?
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
Join my blog at http://sunday-stories.blogspot.com or find me on Facebook. More stuff coming soon…
“The most difficult battle you will ever face is the battle to be unique” James Arthur Ray
The other day a friend and I were having tea (actually carrot juice but tea sounds so much more urbane) and he expressed a concern about all the things he “should” be doing. Getting out in nature more, using cloth diapers, growing a garden all came “shoulding” out. Then I attended a talk given by a very knowledgeable Doctor about fitness and nutrition. And I got “should” on all over. This phrase we use so often is so charged with emotion that it is frightening. These 2 conversations set me to thinking about all the things I “should” be doing. And where do those things come from that I should be doing? Who says I “should” be doing those things? Because, really, if those things were all that important wouldn’t I already be doing them?
Then I start carrying around all my “shoulds” with the rest of My Stuff. This is going to require an awfully big sack after a decade or two. I might even need a hand truck or wagon or something to get it all in! I should have gone to Law School. I should have married that person. I should have taken that job, joined the Army or the Peace Corps, or written that letter. And then there are the people around me telling me about all the things I “should” be doing, or “should” have done. You should exercise more. You should eat better, meditate, and be kinder to animals. Yes you should.
But I feel so bad when I think about the things I should be doing and am not doing. I feel guilty when I don’t exercise, or when I eat food that doesn’t nourish my body the way I want to. I feel remorse when I look back and realize I should have done this or that. These feelings arise because I think some need I have is not being fulfilled. I have a need for health. When I do not exercise that need is not fulfilled. But I do exercise (OK, I don’t exercise, I train) a lot. So how is it if I miss a session I start “shoulding” all over myself. I should have exercised today. Then I start feeling badly and start using the guilt gun on myself. But I did exercise yesterday. And I can exercise tomorrow. So where does this feeling of guilt arise from. What need did I miss, because I am fulfilling my need for health already?
“Should” arises from a cognitive dissonance set up by some expectation I or someone else or society has put upon me. I have an expectation to exercise daily. When I don’t do that I am “out of integrity” with my own plan and my vision of myself. The dis-harmony that this creates is a cognitive dissonance. Think of it as one note on a piano being out of tune. Every time that key is stroked the tune sounds poorly. The more keys that are broken or out of tune the less likely it is that the tune will be harmonious and pleasant to the ear. The more often that I play the tune with broken keys the less likely I am to keep playing the piano. Or, the more often I experience the cognitive dissonance of not exercising when I planned to the more likely it is that I will stop altogether. I dislike the feelings that cognitive dissonance creates in me.
I can fix this cognitive dissonance, these broken keys, if you will. I can refocus my exercise goals. I can make a new plan that will change the dis-harmony into a melody again. The real problem arises from the vague rules or expectations our society puts upon us. This dissonance is a little harder to deal with. I should have a bigger house, a larger bank account, a newer car. Society and culture puts this out there as the one, right, and true way. I should do all these things to be truly productive or successful. Says who? When society “shoulds” on me I can take it to heart and try to create harmony that has my goals and society’s perceived needs in alignment with one another. Or maybe I should play a different tune that doesn’t need to use those broken keys. Maybe I can create a new music that will be in harmony with the world I want to live in, a world where the “shoulds" of society aren’t getting smeared all over me (go here to see what these people are doing about their “shoulds”… http://www.dailygood.org/more.php?n=3619)
This requires me to re-write my programming. This re-creation of what I want to do, what I want my world to look like will require work on my part. It is easy to do what society says I “should” do…get married, have a career, retire, watch the latest reality TV show, and get the latest gadget. It is a little more challenging to discover your purpose and then live every day into the vision of fulfilling your purpose. Discovering what I am meant to do, who the real me is supposed to be is work boys and girls. The struggle to be unique, to be truly how I am not who I “should” be is worthy of our trip here. Or as e. e. cummings said…”It takes courage to grow up and turn out to be who you really are.”
So…ready to grow up?
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
Join my blog at http://sunday-stories.blogspot.com or find me on Facebook. More stuff coming soon…
Saturday, February 28, 2009
Sunday Story...Insanity
Sunday Story…Insanity
I recently attended a talk by a developer in our area extolling all the wonderful developments coming soon to our area. He said several things that got me thinking and wondering. One of the most disturbing things was his comment about the new freeway exchange being built. A mere 140 million dollars or so BUT (here’s the interesting thing) it isn’t costing us any money. The federal government is footing most of the bill with a little from the state government. Wait a second…whose money is that? Don’t I fund the federal government through my tax dollars? Aren’t the highway fees paid in part by gas taxes, road taxes and taxes on trucks and things? And don’t those taxes get passed back to me the consumer in the form of higher prices? So it seems to me that I am in fact paying for that highway improvement. Just like I am going to pay for the bailout package and the stimulus bill and the rest of the bills we are inventing. I find this kind of attitude more than a little disturbing. This is the kind of attitude that got us here in the first place. You know the one…I am not responsible for the things that are happening to me. They are just happening. We are responsible for everything that happens to us. We are responsible for learning the lessons the universe presents to us. It seems to me everyone is waiting for things to “go back to normal”. A return to rampant building and growth and non-sustainable living practices. And when things get back to normal then we can all go back to doing all the things that got us here in the first place. WHAT??? We are going to do the same things and expect a different result?
I am responsible for my life. I am responsible for the world I live in, the people, and the way it looks. Everything about my life is trying to teach me something. My job is to learn the lessons and move forward. Please, please, please, do not tell me the lesson is to see how many big box retailers I can get in my town or how large my house is, or how much stuff I can accumulate. Because if that is the lesson, I quit. Now. No mas, no mas. Come on folks, the lesson is about living in harmony. Living in ways that sustain you and me and the world around us. Get all the stuff you want as long as it is harmonious to the purpose your are living and the evolution of your soul. Make tons of money if that is harmonious and mindful for you and the rest of us. But stop eating just to eat. Stop buying just to have the next thing. Stop doing things because that is the way you have always done them. Do things, buy things, eat with intention. With responsibility. With knowledge that what you are doing today has an affect 7 generations down the road.
Remember the things about MY STUFF? About all the would’ves, could’ves, should’ves, if only this or that hadn’t happened. All the stuff you are have accumulated; all the stories about your life you keep telling yourself? Well, this responsibility thing grows from there. If I am responsible for my stuff, then I can start learning the lessons. And if we all start learning the lessons then our society and culture might have a chance at changing. Or I can keep living in my own small little shell blaming the rest of the world for what is going on. And continuing to do what I have always done, which will get me more of what I have already gotten.
This is insanity folks. Pure unadulterated insanity of the first order. Stop this merry go round, I want off. But Wait (you knew that was coming, right?)…I created this merry go round, I am the engine that drives this merry go round and I am the person who can stop, start, or change directions for this merry go round. ME. I am responsible. It’s my job to see that this merry go round is working for me. Not anyone else’s job. But wait…I am one voice crying in the wilderness, how can I change any of this?
First, start living in ways that are harmonious and intentional. Eat your food with the intention of nourishing your body and soul.
Second, start feeding your mind enriching literature and information. Eliminate stinking thinking by eliminating the dreck that passes for entertainment and information. Sit in nature. Sit in silence for a part of every day.
Third, live a transparent responsible, purposeful life. Like it or not you are a role model…for yourself at the very least. Your life is your legacy. Not the stuff you are going to leave behind. Let us see you. Let us see the choices you are making. Let us see how a life of purpose and harmony might look. We will all learn something from you.
Fourth, get out from behind your desk, off the couch, wake up from your hibernation and get involved in the world. It is your responsibility to make the world look the way you want it to look. If you don’t like something change it…Change it first in your heart, your home, your community and the world will change. Be the change you want to see in the world.
So…now what are you waiting for?
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
Join my blog at http://sunday-stories.blogspot.com or find me on Facebook. More stuff coming soon…
I recently attended a talk by a developer in our area extolling all the wonderful developments coming soon to our area. He said several things that got me thinking and wondering. One of the most disturbing things was his comment about the new freeway exchange being built. A mere 140 million dollars or so BUT (here’s the interesting thing) it isn’t costing us any money. The federal government is footing most of the bill with a little from the state government. Wait a second…whose money is that? Don’t I fund the federal government through my tax dollars? Aren’t the highway fees paid in part by gas taxes, road taxes and taxes on trucks and things? And don’t those taxes get passed back to me the consumer in the form of higher prices? So it seems to me that I am in fact paying for that highway improvement. Just like I am going to pay for the bailout package and the stimulus bill and the rest of the bills we are inventing. I find this kind of attitude more than a little disturbing. This is the kind of attitude that got us here in the first place. You know the one…I am not responsible for the things that are happening to me. They are just happening. We are responsible for everything that happens to us. We are responsible for learning the lessons the universe presents to us. It seems to me everyone is waiting for things to “go back to normal”. A return to rampant building and growth and non-sustainable living practices. And when things get back to normal then we can all go back to doing all the things that got us here in the first place. WHAT??? We are going to do the same things and expect a different result?
I am responsible for my life. I am responsible for the world I live in, the people, and the way it looks. Everything about my life is trying to teach me something. My job is to learn the lessons and move forward. Please, please, please, do not tell me the lesson is to see how many big box retailers I can get in my town or how large my house is, or how much stuff I can accumulate. Because if that is the lesson, I quit. Now. No mas, no mas. Come on folks, the lesson is about living in harmony. Living in ways that sustain you and me and the world around us. Get all the stuff you want as long as it is harmonious to the purpose your are living and the evolution of your soul. Make tons of money if that is harmonious and mindful for you and the rest of us. But stop eating just to eat. Stop buying just to have the next thing. Stop doing things because that is the way you have always done them. Do things, buy things, eat with intention. With responsibility. With knowledge that what you are doing today has an affect 7 generations down the road.
Remember the things about MY STUFF? About all the would’ves, could’ves, should’ves, if only this or that hadn’t happened. All the stuff you are have accumulated; all the stories about your life you keep telling yourself? Well, this responsibility thing grows from there. If I am responsible for my stuff, then I can start learning the lessons. And if we all start learning the lessons then our society and culture might have a chance at changing. Or I can keep living in my own small little shell blaming the rest of the world for what is going on. And continuing to do what I have always done, which will get me more of what I have already gotten.
This is insanity folks. Pure unadulterated insanity of the first order. Stop this merry go round, I want off. But Wait (you knew that was coming, right?)…I created this merry go round, I am the engine that drives this merry go round and I am the person who can stop, start, or change directions for this merry go round. ME. I am responsible. It’s my job to see that this merry go round is working for me. Not anyone else’s job. But wait…I am one voice crying in the wilderness, how can I change any of this?
First, start living in ways that are harmonious and intentional. Eat your food with the intention of nourishing your body and soul.
Second, start feeding your mind enriching literature and information. Eliminate stinking thinking by eliminating the dreck that passes for entertainment and information. Sit in nature. Sit in silence for a part of every day.
Third, live a transparent responsible, purposeful life. Like it or not you are a role model…for yourself at the very least. Your life is your legacy. Not the stuff you are going to leave behind. Let us see you. Let us see the choices you are making. Let us see how a life of purpose and harmony might look. We will all learn something from you.
Fourth, get out from behind your desk, off the couch, wake up from your hibernation and get involved in the world. It is your responsibility to make the world look the way you want it to look. If you don’t like something change it…Change it first in your heart, your home, your community and the world will change. Be the change you want to see in the world.
So…now what are you waiting for?
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
Join my blog at http://sunday-stories.blogspot.com or find me on Facebook. More stuff coming soon…
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Sunday Story...What's Next
Sunday Story…What’s Next?
I received a comment after last weeks story (go to http://sunday-stories.blogspot.com/ to read it) about what to do next? Basically it went like this…you’re right I have some stuff I have been dragging around that isn’t serving me. But what am I supposed to do about it. It isn’t like I can donate it to Goodwill or just flush it down the toilet! You know what my answer was right? Yes, I went there…I guess you will have to read the next Sunday Story! And here we are.
SO…What’s Next with MY Stuff
Looking around…at My Stuff, I see a number of things that I really need to lose, shift, change or transform. And I see some stuff I really like, stuff I want to keep, stuff that is serving me. Let’s face it, My Stuff is comfortable. I like MY Stuff, after all it is mine! But if you want to get rid of some of your MY Stuff here is a way in 3 easy steps!
Step One: Take a look. Get some perspective and do some introspection. Get really, really honest with yourself. Here is an interesting little exercise…write down 10 things about yourself that you don’t think anyone knows and that you don’t really want people to know. Now, take a look at the list. The things are not important. What is important is WHY you don’t want anyone to know about them. Is it shame, guilt, fear of judgment? Where are those feelings coming from? What is the root of those feelings? That is where your MY Stuff is coming from. When you were 4 years old and you got your hand slapped for some infraction and you created “rule” that has informed your life choices since then. Does that rule really serve you? Really? For instance…When I was about 14 I wrote a poem about death and dying, about water and drowning and how it might feel to be dead. You would have thought I had just written the Communist Manifesto. Counseling, conversations with parents, teachers, etc. all ensued. I decided that telling people what I really felt was not such a good idea. And even deeper than that, I decided that being creative, especially in writing was a really bad idea. This served me in ways over the years. In some ways it served to keep me safe in places where it would have been dangerous to express myself. But the cost was the stifling of creativity that injured my soul every time I did it. SO…not really serving me.
Step Two: Figure out how to re-frame your story. Give people the benefit of the doubt, they are most often doing what they think is right and in your best interest. Create a new story around the event. You can’t change the “what’s so” but you can change the “what’s it mean”. So I was 14 and I wrote something that was provocative (hard to believe, I know) and threatening and scary and yes, I really did wonder what it might be like to drown and be dead. My parents were worried (and rightfully so). They reacted in a way that made sense to them. They did not do it to stifle me, or to create a schism in my psyche. So instead of saying to me that writing and being self expressed is not safe, my story now, is that when I write I elicit strong and powerful reactions in people. My writing is emotional and meaningful and creates a visceral response in my readers. See how much more powerful that story is than the other one. The one that has me running and hiding from my talent? This story empowers me and honors the talent and purpose I am here to fulfill.
Step Three: Give your old story a send off with gratitude and blessings. It served you and kept you over these last few years. Forgive anyone who needs to be forgiven around the event. Love the young you that made the “rules” in the face of incomplete and immature knowledge.
Start doing the thing(s) that your previous rules would not let you do. Take baby steps, be gentle with yourself as you rediscover a part of yourself that has been buried and protected for all this time. A large part of what you are reading these days is a result of this process. 5 years ago this effort would have been impossible. I would not have allowed myself the freedom to expose my thoughts and emotions in this way. By changing my story, by letting go of MY Stuff, I found my voice, my muse that propels me, and I healed that hole in my soul that needs to write and be self expressed.
Are you willing to let go of your stuff in 3 easy steps? There is the blueprint to start re-building the authentic and transparent self the world is waiting for. Pretty simple isn’t it? Here is the small print (no, my attorney didn’t write it!)---this is not an easy process, you will be scraping layers of gunk and debris away from parts of you, parts you have hidden for some time. This may leave you raw and irritated. The people around you might not understand why you are doing this. Side Effects may include soul retrieval, self love, return of playful joy and a childish giggle.
On the other hand…you can keep it the way it is (not!) Look folks; the world is changing, shifting, evolving. We need to find our purpose, the purpose we were put her to do and then live into that purpose. Your job is to live into that purpose. And it is going to be very difficult to do that if you are dragging all those old stories and beliefs around behind you. You get to decide who and what you are. You CAN change the past by changing the story you are telling about it. And you can live into the future the same way. Create your life by creating the stories you tell about it!
Subscribe to my blog at http://sunday-stories.blogspot.com/ . For personal focus coaching, goal setting, physical, nutritional, and emotional transformation, and storytelling contact me at jmariotti@gbis.com.
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
I received a comment after last weeks story (go to http://sunday-stories.blogspot.com/ to read it) about what to do next? Basically it went like this…you’re right I have some stuff I have been dragging around that isn’t serving me. But what am I supposed to do about it. It isn’t like I can donate it to Goodwill or just flush it down the toilet! You know what my answer was right? Yes, I went there…I guess you will have to read the next Sunday Story! And here we are.
SO…What’s Next with MY Stuff
Looking around…at My Stuff, I see a number of things that I really need to lose, shift, change or transform. And I see some stuff I really like, stuff I want to keep, stuff that is serving me. Let’s face it, My Stuff is comfortable. I like MY Stuff, after all it is mine! But if you want to get rid of some of your MY Stuff here is a way in 3 easy steps!
Step One: Take a look. Get some perspective and do some introspection. Get really, really honest with yourself. Here is an interesting little exercise…write down 10 things about yourself that you don’t think anyone knows and that you don’t really want people to know. Now, take a look at the list. The things are not important. What is important is WHY you don’t want anyone to know about them. Is it shame, guilt, fear of judgment? Where are those feelings coming from? What is the root of those feelings? That is where your MY Stuff is coming from. When you were 4 years old and you got your hand slapped for some infraction and you created “rule” that has informed your life choices since then. Does that rule really serve you? Really? For instance…When I was about 14 I wrote a poem about death and dying, about water and drowning and how it might feel to be dead. You would have thought I had just written the Communist Manifesto. Counseling, conversations with parents, teachers, etc. all ensued. I decided that telling people what I really felt was not such a good idea. And even deeper than that, I decided that being creative, especially in writing was a really bad idea. This served me in ways over the years. In some ways it served to keep me safe in places where it would have been dangerous to express myself. But the cost was the stifling of creativity that injured my soul every time I did it. SO…not really serving me.
Step Two: Figure out how to re-frame your story. Give people the benefit of the doubt, they are most often doing what they think is right and in your best interest. Create a new story around the event. You can’t change the “what’s so” but you can change the “what’s it mean”. So I was 14 and I wrote something that was provocative (hard to believe, I know) and threatening and scary and yes, I really did wonder what it might be like to drown and be dead. My parents were worried (and rightfully so). They reacted in a way that made sense to them. They did not do it to stifle me, or to create a schism in my psyche. So instead of saying to me that writing and being self expressed is not safe, my story now, is that when I write I elicit strong and powerful reactions in people. My writing is emotional and meaningful and creates a visceral response in my readers. See how much more powerful that story is than the other one. The one that has me running and hiding from my talent? This story empowers me and honors the talent and purpose I am here to fulfill.
Step Three: Give your old story a send off with gratitude and blessings. It served you and kept you over these last few years. Forgive anyone who needs to be forgiven around the event. Love the young you that made the “rules” in the face of incomplete and immature knowledge.
Start doing the thing(s) that your previous rules would not let you do. Take baby steps, be gentle with yourself as you rediscover a part of yourself that has been buried and protected for all this time. A large part of what you are reading these days is a result of this process. 5 years ago this effort would have been impossible. I would not have allowed myself the freedom to expose my thoughts and emotions in this way. By changing my story, by letting go of MY Stuff, I found my voice, my muse that propels me, and I healed that hole in my soul that needs to write and be self expressed.
Are you willing to let go of your stuff in 3 easy steps? There is the blueprint to start re-building the authentic and transparent self the world is waiting for. Pretty simple isn’t it? Here is the small print (no, my attorney didn’t write it!)---this is not an easy process, you will be scraping layers of gunk and debris away from parts of you, parts you have hidden for some time. This may leave you raw and irritated. The people around you might not understand why you are doing this. Side Effects may include soul retrieval, self love, return of playful joy and a childish giggle.
On the other hand…you can keep it the way it is (not!) Look folks; the world is changing, shifting, evolving. We need to find our purpose, the purpose we were put her to do and then live into that purpose. Your job is to live into that purpose. And it is going to be very difficult to do that if you are dragging all those old stories and beliefs around behind you. You get to decide who and what you are. You CAN change the past by changing the story you are telling about it. And you can live into the future the same way. Create your life by creating the stories you tell about it!
Subscribe to my blog at http://sunday-stories.blogspot.com/ . For personal focus coaching, goal setting, physical, nutritional, and emotional transformation, and storytelling contact me at jmariotti@gbis.com.
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
Saturday, February 14, 2009
Sunday Story...My Stuff
First a note:
To all of you who comment on these stories…THANK YOU. I live for your comments. And I am not always able to answer each of you, so my apologies. I will get better. Please keep commenting.
Sunday Story…My Stuff
I have stuff. Lots of stuff. We all have stuff. Lots of stuff. Look around your life and check out all the stuff you have. In a world where having more than one pair of shoes makes me wealthy I am a millionaire and some of my friends, well, let’s say they are on the Warren Buffet/Bill Gates scale. The same goes for cars, clothes, TVs, and electronic gadgets (including the one I am using to write this on!). How much stuff do we really need? Do we really need any more stuff? We all know our stuff can’t follow us past this life. Most of our stuff won’t be any good in a few months or years. What do you have today that you had 10 years ago? Not much I would guess. And of the stuff you have had more than 10 years how often are you still enjoying it?
BUT…this is not the stuff I want to talk about today. The stuff in the paragraph above is the clutter and detritus of your modern life. My stuff is the stuff I am carrying around with me every day. My preconceived notions and ideas about the “way things should be.” My beliefs about myself and the world around me. It was not that long ago that the majority of people believed the world was flat. That is the stuff I am talking about. Humans are “meaning” making machines. We love to have things with meaning. Over the course of my life things have happened. All kinds of things. I have chosen to interpret or create meaning for those events. The meaning I assigned to those events becomes My Stuff.
How much of My Stuff is still serving me? In my garage, I have a pair of polished cow horns. You know the kind I am talking about…huge, about 4 feet from tip to tip, highly polished, the sort you might see in a ranch house over the fireplace, or on the front of a big ole Cadillac in Texas. These horns were pretty cool and very decorative when I lived on a ranch in the middle of nowhere Nevada. Now they are collecting dust in my garage, as they really don’t fit in with the asian-buddha décor in my current home. Those horns are no longer serving me. The opinions of myself I formed when I was 4 years old no longer serve me. The attitudes I created to protect my ego when I was 13 may not be the best attitudes for my adult self to be walking around with. This is the My Stuff I should be inspecting and jettisoning if it no longer serves me.
We often say “seeing is believing”. I want to see it in front of me before I want to believe it. So why, when you look in the mirror and see an adult looking back at you, do you let the little child hiding in the back of your psyche control and manipulate your life? We live in a world with abundant resources for knowledge and personal growth. There are so many places for you (and I) to go to create new meanings for the various events in our lives. There is no reason for any of us to stay mired in the mud of self pity and infantile attitudes. Actually now that I just wrote that…there is reasons for you to stay stuck in your My Stuff…it’s easy and it’s comfortable. It does not require you to do anything. If you want to lose some of your “My Stuff”, you will have to get off the couch, put the remote down and DO something. And the first thing you will have to do is take a look and see what sort of “My Stuff” you have been carrying around all these years. And then decide if any of it is really serving you, helping you create the life you want to live. After you open that door the rest is simple. Not easy but simple. Create new stories for the things that happened in your life. Take responsibility for what happened; it is your life after all.
This is part and parcel of the work required of us as humans. This is the evolution of your soul. How many stories have I sent you of people doing amazing things in spite of challenging things in their lives. Remember Nick the man with no arms? Amazing. The kid with cancer whose “make a wish wish” wasn’t Disney land or a Sports figure but to create a foundation for an orphanage in Africa to have a school? By the way, Make a wish had a real problem with that one…apparently they just had a hard time getting their stuff around it. What makes those individuals Stuff different than the next person with the same challenges? It is the story they are telling themselves…the Stuff they are carrying.
My Stuff is mine. I get to decide if I am going to keep it and let it run my life. Or not. Maybe My Stuff needs to be thrown out in favor of some new “My Stuff”. Get some modern stuff that will serve the person I am today and the person I want to be tomorrow and next week and next year. I get to work on My Stuff. Or not. My Decision. Your Decision.
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
To all of you who comment on these stories…THANK YOU. I live for your comments. And I am not always able to answer each of you, so my apologies. I will get better. Please keep commenting.
Sunday Story…My Stuff
I have stuff. Lots of stuff. We all have stuff. Lots of stuff. Look around your life and check out all the stuff you have. In a world where having more than one pair of shoes makes me wealthy I am a millionaire and some of my friends, well, let’s say they are on the Warren Buffet/Bill Gates scale. The same goes for cars, clothes, TVs, and electronic gadgets (including the one I am using to write this on!). How much stuff do we really need? Do we really need any more stuff? We all know our stuff can’t follow us past this life. Most of our stuff won’t be any good in a few months or years. What do you have today that you had 10 years ago? Not much I would guess. And of the stuff you have had more than 10 years how often are you still enjoying it?
BUT…this is not the stuff I want to talk about today. The stuff in the paragraph above is the clutter and detritus of your modern life. My stuff is the stuff I am carrying around with me every day. My preconceived notions and ideas about the “way things should be.” My beliefs about myself and the world around me. It was not that long ago that the majority of people believed the world was flat. That is the stuff I am talking about. Humans are “meaning” making machines. We love to have things with meaning. Over the course of my life things have happened. All kinds of things. I have chosen to interpret or create meaning for those events. The meaning I assigned to those events becomes My Stuff.
How much of My Stuff is still serving me? In my garage, I have a pair of polished cow horns. You know the kind I am talking about…huge, about 4 feet from tip to tip, highly polished, the sort you might see in a ranch house over the fireplace, or on the front of a big ole Cadillac in Texas. These horns were pretty cool and very decorative when I lived on a ranch in the middle of nowhere Nevada. Now they are collecting dust in my garage, as they really don’t fit in with the asian-buddha décor in my current home. Those horns are no longer serving me. The opinions of myself I formed when I was 4 years old no longer serve me. The attitudes I created to protect my ego when I was 13 may not be the best attitudes for my adult self to be walking around with. This is the My Stuff I should be inspecting and jettisoning if it no longer serves me.
We often say “seeing is believing”. I want to see it in front of me before I want to believe it. So why, when you look in the mirror and see an adult looking back at you, do you let the little child hiding in the back of your psyche control and manipulate your life? We live in a world with abundant resources for knowledge and personal growth. There are so many places for you (and I) to go to create new meanings for the various events in our lives. There is no reason for any of us to stay mired in the mud of self pity and infantile attitudes. Actually now that I just wrote that…there is reasons for you to stay stuck in your My Stuff…it’s easy and it’s comfortable. It does not require you to do anything. If you want to lose some of your “My Stuff”, you will have to get off the couch, put the remote down and DO something. And the first thing you will have to do is take a look and see what sort of “My Stuff” you have been carrying around all these years. And then decide if any of it is really serving you, helping you create the life you want to live. After you open that door the rest is simple. Not easy but simple. Create new stories for the things that happened in your life. Take responsibility for what happened; it is your life after all.
This is part and parcel of the work required of us as humans. This is the evolution of your soul. How many stories have I sent you of people doing amazing things in spite of challenging things in their lives. Remember Nick the man with no arms? Amazing. The kid with cancer whose “make a wish wish” wasn’t Disney land or a Sports figure but to create a foundation for an orphanage in Africa to have a school? By the way, Make a wish had a real problem with that one…apparently they just had a hard time getting their stuff around it. What makes those individuals Stuff different than the next person with the same challenges? It is the story they are telling themselves…the Stuff they are carrying.
My Stuff is mine. I get to decide if I am going to keep it and let it run my life. Or not. Maybe My Stuff needs to be thrown out in favor of some new “My Stuff”. Get some modern stuff that will serve the person I am today and the person I want to be tomorrow and next week and next year. I get to work on My Stuff. Or not. My Decision. Your Decision.
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Sunday Story...Journaling
Sunday Story…Journaling
About 6 months ago a friend came to me and said “you should write the Sunday story yourself. “ Thus began the genesis of what you are reading today. Before that I would scour the web for some inspirational story or something to comment on and share it with all of you. Now after a little push, I write, every week, a story designed to inspire each and every one of you. Sometimes I try to touch you emotionally, or get you to thinking a little out of the box, or even motivate you to action on some level. This is my mission…to inspire transformation. These stories are my journal of that effort.
In almost every personal growth book or program I have read or undertaken there is invariably a request to “journal”. Many people find this requirement to be the most difficult part of any process. Why is that? After all, just write a few words on paper and you are done. When I was participating in The Ultimate Black Belt Test 3 a few years ago we were required to journal every week. It was difficult for me and many of my team mates. There is always an excuse, a reason it did not get done. Everything from…I forgot, I don’t have anything to say, I can’t type, I don’t write well, to No one cares what I have to say, my words don’t matter, and It’s too hard. Yep, got it. All those things are great reasons not to do it.
AND there is one over-riding reason to do it and do it faithfully. Yes, it will provide a record, a chronicle of your journey. Yes, it will help you keep the project at the front of your mind. BUT the single most reason for you to journal at least weekly is…YOU WILL TRANSFORM YOUR THINKING. And, you may ask, why is that important? It so simple really…THE WAY YOU THINK INFORMS, MOVES, AND SHAPES YOUR ENTIRE LIFE!!!!!
Right now we are doing the first ever Relentless Fitness Challenge. Each participant is required to keep a food journal. Everything you eat and drink every day for a week. This changes how you think about your food. It forces more intentionality around your food choices. A very good practice and the first step to growing into the optimum health we all desire. I have found this part of the project very difficult. Yet it is very revealing about my eating habits. Thus my mind is shifting.
As part of another process I am participating in, I write down 10 things that I did every day. Yes, there is a record of how I spent my time and what I accomplished, but even more important it forces me to look and ask if what I am doing is serving my mission and vision. Do my activities feed my larger mission? All too often at the end of the day we ask “what exactly did I do? What did I accomplish today?”
I sincerely believe we were put here, now, to evolve our soul. As part of that evolution, I need to discover my purpose. I want to live a life OF purpose ON purpose. If I live my purpose I will be doing the work I was put here to do. Journaling is part of discovering your purpose. When I change my mind I change my life!
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
PS. If you remember last week’s story about being green…here is a video of some “urban homesteaders” in Pasadena California. I wonder if there isn’t some of this we can’t do now in our own lives? The link is here:
http://video.nytimes.com/video/2008/04/18/magazine/1194817108584/life-mostly-off-the-grid.html
About 6 months ago a friend came to me and said “you should write the Sunday story yourself. “ Thus began the genesis of what you are reading today. Before that I would scour the web for some inspirational story or something to comment on and share it with all of you. Now after a little push, I write, every week, a story designed to inspire each and every one of you. Sometimes I try to touch you emotionally, or get you to thinking a little out of the box, or even motivate you to action on some level. This is my mission…to inspire transformation. These stories are my journal of that effort.
In almost every personal growth book or program I have read or undertaken there is invariably a request to “journal”. Many people find this requirement to be the most difficult part of any process. Why is that? After all, just write a few words on paper and you are done. When I was participating in The Ultimate Black Belt Test 3 a few years ago we were required to journal every week. It was difficult for me and many of my team mates. There is always an excuse, a reason it did not get done. Everything from…I forgot, I don’t have anything to say, I can’t type, I don’t write well, to No one cares what I have to say, my words don’t matter, and It’s too hard. Yep, got it. All those things are great reasons not to do it.
AND there is one over-riding reason to do it and do it faithfully. Yes, it will provide a record, a chronicle of your journey. Yes, it will help you keep the project at the front of your mind. BUT the single most reason for you to journal at least weekly is…YOU WILL TRANSFORM YOUR THINKING. And, you may ask, why is that important? It so simple really…THE WAY YOU THINK INFORMS, MOVES, AND SHAPES YOUR ENTIRE LIFE!!!!!
Right now we are doing the first ever Relentless Fitness Challenge. Each participant is required to keep a food journal. Everything you eat and drink every day for a week. This changes how you think about your food. It forces more intentionality around your food choices. A very good practice and the first step to growing into the optimum health we all desire. I have found this part of the project very difficult. Yet it is very revealing about my eating habits. Thus my mind is shifting.
As part of another process I am participating in, I write down 10 things that I did every day. Yes, there is a record of how I spent my time and what I accomplished, but even more important it forces me to look and ask if what I am doing is serving my mission and vision. Do my activities feed my larger mission? All too often at the end of the day we ask “what exactly did I do? What did I accomplish today?”
I sincerely believe we were put here, now, to evolve our soul. As part of that evolution, I need to discover my purpose. I want to live a life OF purpose ON purpose. If I live my purpose I will be doing the work I was put here to do. Journaling is part of discovering your purpose. When I change my mind I change my life!
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
PS. If you remember last week’s story about being green…here is a video of some “urban homesteaders” in Pasadena California. I wonder if there isn’t some of this we can’t do now in our own lives? The link is here:
http://video.nytimes.com/video/2008/04/18/magazine/1194817108584/life-mostly-off-the-grid.html
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