Posts
Sunday Story…Cleaning House
It is that time of year. The time when we start opening windows, cleaning the closets, and generally rebirthing our lives. It is spring. The time of renewal. The time when life starts anew and we can look forward to warmth and sun. Many of us will spend time cleaning our homes, washing the winter’s dirt off and generally getting in touch with the growing side of life. I love a fresh spring breeze blowing through the house, clothes dried on the outside line, and a feeling of renewal surging inside me.
There are some other places that need some sweeping out as well. Let’s start with your insides. Yes, your insides. Your liver, your kidneys, your colon, and all the rest need to be cleaned up and restarted. As we live our bodies accumulate waste and toxins in various places…liver, kidneys, and colon just for starters. A “cleanse” is designed to help flush out excess waste and de-toxify various body organs. Think of it like hitting the re-set button for your body or a spring cleaning for your body. Finding a good quality cleanse program to pull all that accumulated waste out of the organs and pipes will do wonders for your skin, hair, nails, and your mental outlook. You will lose some excess weight, some inches off your belly, and improve the way you feel about yourself. Do not go for the quick fix on this one…you know… the three day take some pills and see what happens cleanse. This will not create the healthy habits we need to sustain a healthy regimen. It takes 21 days to create new habits. It takes 21 days to replace bad habits with good ones. It takes 21 days to get all the sugar, flour and junk out of your system. There is no short cut to optimum health.
Another place to look at a little spring cleaning is your mind. What…a mental cleanse? How do you do that? A friend of mine recently took a red pen to a newspaper to highlight the negative news, a yellow pen for neutral and a blue pen for the good news. 60% of the articles were red and only 15% were green! We are surrounded by negativity in the news media and in television programming. We grab some people and put them in weird situations and then watch them and their relationships fall apart and call it reality TV. I spend a fair amount of time with children and I have yet to have one of them tell me that he or she wanted to be a couch potato when they grow up. A Doctor, a Lawyer, An Astronaut, or the President, yes, but never a couch potato. So what are you going to do to clean up your mind, how to rid it of negativity and mediocrity? Start with a cleanse of mass media…that’s right turn off the TV, stop reading the newspaper, listening to talk radio. Turn it off for 21 days. And in that 21 days replace the TV and it’s negativity with positive messages. Positive messages from books from Stephen Covey, Maxwell Maltz, Napoleon Hill, Dale Carnegie, Joel; Osteen, Anthony Robbins, Bob Proctor, Eckhardt Tolle, James Arthur Ray just to name a few. You could listen to many of these books on CD (or tape) in your car on the way to wherever you are going. Imagine what it would be like to fill your mind with positive messages throughout the day instead of drivel about things you cannot do one thing about. After all, the only thing you can transform is yourself not me not the economy, not your boss or your spouse. 21 days of no TV. Sit and talk to your loved ones. Better yet, sit and listen, really listen to your loved ones.
Do we dare talk about your soul? How about a little soul cleanse? Another one that is not so easy to look at. How will we scrub some of the debris that we have been carrying around for these years? We have mentioned this before. Inspect the stories you are telling yourself. How are they serving you? Spend 15 minutes a day sitting in silence. Just sitting and breathing. When a thought comes up, recognize it, wave at it even and then say to yourself, “thought”, and go back to breathing. How long? 15 minutes a day for 21 days will have it be a habit. Meditation is listening; listening to your breath, listening to the rocks move, linking your breath to the emptiness that surrounds us. Then add prayer. Prayer is speaking; speaking your intention into the world. Whether you pray to a supreme being or a divine source, or you just speak your intention and express your gratitude. Again in 21 days your daily prayers will become a good habit that feeds your soul.
Body, mind, and soul all working together. A beautiful thing to behold. When our thoughts our deeds and our emotions are all in harmony, all working together we can be assured of a successful life. Our loved ones will be better looking and our children well behaved (well…I might be over the top here). Restore yourself in the spring just like your lawn, your house, and your garden. Spend the time getting right with yourself…clean your body, mind and soul. You will be amazed at the results. And if not…well, you can always go back to doing what you were doing before right?
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
Follow my blog at http://sunday-stories.blogspot.com/
Twitter me at: http://twitter.com/jmariotti
Facebook: John Mariotti
Showing posts with label Personal Growth. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Personal Growth. Show all posts
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Sunday Story…Thoughts for Food
“…It’s remarkable how much mediocrity we live with, surrounding ourselves with daily reminders that the average is the acceptable. Our world suffers from terminal normality…” Stewart Emory
Last week a friend told me about an assignment her son was asked to do for his history class. The assignment called for him to put himself in the place of a Plantation owner in the Southern USA when slavery was prevalent. It instructed him to write and explore how he would deal with the “slave problem”, how he would deal with runaways and discipline and how he could motivate them to get the most from their labor. There were several restrictions on the assignment including the one that stated freeing the slaves was not an option. Needless to say I was shocked. I am not sure how this kind of exploration serves our learning and understanding of the problem. Worse than that…thinking about how I am going to treat my slaves is just wrong. This kind of thinking can drive us right into the conceptual idea that slavery isn’t so bad. And that is a very bad thing indeed.
I teach a thing called FAST defense. In FAST defense I become the assailant, the “bad guy”. I assume the role of attacker, mugger, and rapist. I wear a suit that allows the participants to defend themselves in real time using full force techniques on a human person (me). It is dirty work for me. It pushes lots of buttons for me. Buttons of being overly aggressive and angry, buttons of doing and saying very evil and nasty things to people I may know and like. And in the “woofer” mode my job is to have you travel down the road of adrenal response. To feel in your guts that fear and energy that could cost you your life or sanity and to discover the power inside you that converts fear into power. Without the woofer you do not get adrenalized and do not discover how to turn fear into power. The woofer is acting. He is not the actual assailant, and when it is all over the woofer returns to his normal personality. But I can speak from experience that the return is not immediate. There is something that happens to you when you enter the mindset of “dirt bag”, or rapist, or just plain old bad guy. There is a residual, a left over, “the ring around the chi” that lingers around until you clear it off. When we finish FAST training I always have to take some time to cleanse myself of all the negative energy and thoughts that I have created. Putting myself in the place of a slave owner is the same exercise as “woofing” and would require cleansing after the exercise.
Why should you stay away from network news and negative information? It is not as if you are putting any emotion or energy into the news, right? Negative thoughts and information carry a lot of chi or energy in their natural state. There are concepts in the world that, by their very nature, carry so much emotion and life (or death) force that they are going to generate strong reaction in us. Murder, Slavery, Pedophilia are all actions and concepts that are hurtful to the human soul and psyche. Exploring these things can be very dangerous to your soul. Not because you are going to do them but because they have the ability to evoke very strong emotions in us in a negative sense. But we also can’t be a “polly anna” either. These things happen every day in our world and to ignore them is to condone them. But we cannot spend every waking hour putting ourselves in the shoes of the evil doers. It is not productive for our mental state of mind. There are some things that do not belong in our bodies or our minds. We need to know the dangers, we need to train to prevent the dangers from happening to us and our loved ones, and we need to understand what and how these evils occur. BUT we do not need to start thinking like the evil doers. That is a tunnel with no cheese at the end of it.
My thoughts become my reality. What I spend my time on in the interior of my mind is where I will spend my time on in the exterior of my life. If I spend my time thinking about all the bad things, the negative things going on in the world today, my mind will become polluted like a stream being constantly fed poison. It will never have a chance to cleanse itself.
We need to feed our mind like we feed our body, with good solid food. The kind of food that will empower us to become greater than we are today. There are many sources for the kind of nourishment I am talking about…for many scripture is their food, for others it is personal growth book. Spiritual literature, teaching stories, uplifting movies (Spiritual Cinema), music that messages the positive are all things that will feed your mind and your soul positively. Going to workshops to learn new skills, or to get information about your inner aspects, or to find more like minded people will all provide nutrients for your inner ecology. Meditation and prayer on a daily basis help provide the habitual framework for positive thinking and a mental outlook that goes beyond the ordinary. The habit of reading uplifting literature before going to bed will create, in your subconscious, an environment of hope and joy.
I leave you with this quote from Marianne Williamson:
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
What are you doing today to be the powerful being you are meant to be? Who says you cannot be all the things you want to be? Get out of your head and get into our heart. Into the part of you that knows, deep down, that you are meant to raise the vibration of every living thing on this planet.
Let’s start now, together, on a journey that will move mountains.
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
Join my blog at http://sunday-stories.blogspot.com or find me on Facebook. More stuff coming soon…
“…It’s remarkable how much mediocrity we live with, surrounding ourselves with daily reminders that the average is the acceptable. Our world suffers from terminal normality…” Stewart Emory
Last week a friend told me about an assignment her son was asked to do for his history class. The assignment called for him to put himself in the place of a Plantation owner in the Southern USA when slavery was prevalent. It instructed him to write and explore how he would deal with the “slave problem”, how he would deal with runaways and discipline and how he could motivate them to get the most from their labor. There were several restrictions on the assignment including the one that stated freeing the slaves was not an option. Needless to say I was shocked. I am not sure how this kind of exploration serves our learning and understanding of the problem. Worse than that…thinking about how I am going to treat my slaves is just wrong. This kind of thinking can drive us right into the conceptual idea that slavery isn’t so bad. And that is a very bad thing indeed.
I teach a thing called FAST defense. In FAST defense I become the assailant, the “bad guy”. I assume the role of attacker, mugger, and rapist. I wear a suit that allows the participants to defend themselves in real time using full force techniques on a human person (me). It is dirty work for me. It pushes lots of buttons for me. Buttons of being overly aggressive and angry, buttons of doing and saying very evil and nasty things to people I may know and like. And in the “woofer” mode my job is to have you travel down the road of adrenal response. To feel in your guts that fear and energy that could cost you your life or sanity and to discover the power inside you that converts fear into power. Without the woofer you do not get adrenalized and do not discover how to turn fear into power. The woofer is acting. He is not the actual assailant, and when it is all over the woofer returns to his normal personality. But I can speak from experience that the return is not immediate. There is something that happens to you when you enter the mindset of “dirt bag”, or rapist, or just plain old bad guy. There is a residual, a left over, “the ring around the chi” that lingers around until you clear it off. When we finish FAST training I always have to take some time to cleanse myself of all the negative energy and thoughts that I have created. Putting myself in the place of a slave owner is the same exercise as “woofing” and would require cleansing after the exercise.
Why should you stay away from network news and negative information? It is not as if you are putting any emotion or energy into the news, right? Negative thoughts and information carry a lot of chi or energy in their natural state. There are concepts in the world that, by their very nature, carry so much emotion and life (or death) force that they are going to generate strong reaction in us. Murder, Slavery, Pedophilia are all actions and concepts that are hurtful to the human soul and psyche. Exploring these things can be very dangerous to your soul. Not because you are going to do them but because they have the ability to evoke very strong emotions in us in a negative sense. But we also can’t be a “polly anna” either. These things happen every day in our world and to ignore them is to condone them. But we cannot spend every waking hour putting ourselves in the shoes of the evil doers. It is not productive for our mental state of mind. There are some things that do not belong in our bodies or our minds. We need to know the dangers, we need to train to prevent the dangers from happening to us and our loved ones, and we need to understand what and how these evils occur. BUT we do not need to start thinking like the evil doers. That is a tunnel with no cheese at the end of it.
My thoughts become my reality. What I spend my time on in the interior of my mind is where I will spend my time on in the exterior of my life. If I spend my time thinking about all the bad things, the negative things going on in the world today, my mind will become polluted like a stream being constantly fed poison. It will never have a chance to cleanse itself.
We need to feed our mind like we feed our body, with good solid food. The kind of food that will empower us to become greater than we are today. There are many sources for the kind of nourishment I am talking about…for many scripture is their food, for others it is personal growth book. Spiritual literature, teaching stories, uplifting movies (Spiritual Cinema), music that messages the positive are all things that will feed your mind and your soul positively. Going to workshops to learn new skills, or to get information about your inner aspects, or to find more like minded people will all provide nutrients for your inner ecology. Meditation and prayer on a daily basis help provide the habitual framework for positive thinking and a mental outlook that goes beyond the ordinary. The habit of reading uplifting literature before going to bed will create, in your subconscious, an environment of hope and joy.
I leave you with this quote from Marianne Williamson:
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
What are you doing today to be the powerful being you are meant to be? Who says you cannot be all the things you want to be? Get out of your head and get into our heart. Into the part of you that knows, deep down, that you are meant to raise the vibration of every living thing on this planet.
Let’s start now, together, on a journey that will move mountains.
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
Join my blog at http://sunday-stories.blogspot.com or find me on Facebook. More stuff coming soon…
Saturday, March 7, 2009
Sunday Story...Don't Should on Me
Sunday Story…Don’t Should on Me
“The most difficult battle you will ever face is the battle to be unique” James Arthur Ray
The other day a friend and I were having tea (actually carrot juice but tea sounds so much more urbane) and he expressed a concern about all the things he “should” be doing. Getting out in nature more, using cloth diapers, growing a garden all came “shoulding” out. Then I attended a talk given by a very knowledgeable Doctor about fitness and nutrition. And I got “should” on all over. This phrase we use so often is so charged with emotion that it is frightening. These 2 conversations set me to thinking about all the things I “should” be doing. And where do those things come from that I should be doing? Who says I “should” be doing those things? Because, really, if those things were all that important wouldn’t I already be doing them?
Then I start carrying around all my “shoulds” with the rest of My Stuff. This is going to require an awfully big sack after a decade or two. I might even need a hand truck or wagon or something to get it all in! I should have gone to Law School. I should have married that person. I should have taken that job, joined the Army or the Peace Corps, or written that letter. And then there are the people around me telling me about all the things I “should” be doing, or “should” have done. You should exercise more. You should eat better, meditate, and be kinder to animals. Yes you should.
But I feel so bad when I think about the things I should be doing and am not doing. I feel guilty when I don’t exercise, or when I eat food that doesn’t nourish my body the way I want to. I feel remorse when I look back and realize I should have done this or that. These feelings arise because I think some need I have is not being fulfilled. I have a need for health. When I do not exercise that need is not fulfilled. But I do exercise (OK, I don’t exercise, I train) a lot. So how is it if I miss a session I start “shoulding” all over myself. I should have exercised today. Then I start feeling badly and start using the guilt gun on myself. But I did exercise yesterday. And I can exercise tomorrow. So where does this feeling of guilt arise from. What need did I miss, because I am fulfilling my need for health already?
“Should” arises from a cognitive dissonance set up by some expectation I or someone else or society has put upon me. I have an expectation to exercise daily. When I don’t do that I am “out of integrity” with my own plan and my vision of myself. The dis-harmony that this creates is a cognitive dissonance. Think of it as one note on a piano being out of tune. Every time that key is stroked the tune sounds poorly. The more keys that are broken or out of tune the less likely it is that the tune will be harmonious and pleasant to the ear. The more often that I play the tune with broken keys the less likely I am to keep playing the piano. Or, the more often I experience the cognitive dissonance of not exercising when I planned to the more likely it is that I will stop altogether. I dislike the feelings that cognitive dissonance creates in me.
I can fix this cognitive dissonance, these broken keys, if you will. I can refocus my exercise goals. I can make a new plan that will change the dis-harmony into a melody again. The real problem arises from the vague rules or expectations our society puts upon us. This dissonance is a little harder to deal with. I should have a bigger house, a larger bank account, a newer car. Society and culture puts this out there as the one, right, and true way. I should do all these things to be truly productive or successful. Says who? When society “shoulds” on me I can take it to heart and try to create harmony that has my goals and society’s perceived needs in alignment with one another. Or maybe I should play a different tune that doesn’t need to use those broken keys. Maybe I can create a new music that will be in harmony with the world I want to live in, a world where the “shoulds" of society aren’t getting smeared all over me (go here to see what these people are doing about their “shoulds”… http://www.dailygood.org/more.php?n=3619)
This requires me to re-write my programming. This re-creation of what I want to do, what I want my world to look like will require work on my part. It is easy to do what society says I “should” do…get married, have a career, retire, watch the latest reality TV show, and get the latest gadget. It is a little more challenging to discover your purpose and then live every day into the vision of fulfilling your purpose. Discovering what I am meant to do, who the real me is supposed to be is work boys and girls. The struggle to be unique, to be truly how I am not who I “should” be is worthy of our trip here. Or as e. e. cummings said…”It takes courage to grow up and turn out to be who you really are.”
So…ready to grow up?
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
Join my blog at http://sunday-stories.blogspot.com or find me on Facebook. More stuff coming soon…
“The most difficult battle you will ever face is the battle to be unique” James Arthur Ray
The other day a friend and I were having tea (actually carrot juice but tea sounds so much more urbane) and he expressed a concern about all the things he “should” be doing. Getting out in nature more, using cloth diapers, growing a garden all came “shoulding” out. Then I attended a talk given by a very knowledgeable Doctor about fitness and nutrition. And I got “should” on all over. This phrase we use so often is so charged with emotion that it is frightening. These 2 conversations set me to thinking about all the things I “should” be doing. And where do those things come from that I should be doing? Who says I “should” be doing those things? Because, really, if those things were all that important wouldn’t I already be doing them?
Then I start carrying around all my “shoulds” with the rest of My Stuff. This is going to require an awfully big sack after a decade or two. I might even need a hand truck or wagon or something to get it all in! I should have gone to Law School. I should have married that person. I should have taken that job, joined the Army or the Peace Corps, or written that letter. And then there are the people around me telling me about all the things I “should” be doing, or “should” have done. You should exercise more. You should eat better, meditate, and be kinder to animals. Yes you should.
But I feel so bad when I think about the things I should be doing and am not doing. I feel guilty when I don’t exercise, or when I eat food that doesn’t nourish my body the way I want to. I feel remorse when I look back and realize I should have done this or that. These feelings arise because I think some need I have is not being fulfilled. I have a need for health. When I do not exercise that need is not fulfilled. But I do exercise (OK, I don’t exercise, I train) a lot. So how is it if I miss a session I start “shoulding” all over myself. I should have exercised today. Then I start feeling badly and start using the guilt gun on myself. But I did exercise yesterday. And I can exercise tomorrow. So where does this feeling of guilt arise from. What need did I miss, because I am fulfilling my need for health already?
“Should” arises from a cognitive dissonance set up by some expectation I or someone else or society has put upon me. I have an expectation to exercise daily. When I don’t do that I am “out of integrity” with my own plan and my vision of myself. The dis-harmony that this creates is a cognitive dissonance. Think of it as one note on a piano being out of tune. Every time that key is stroked the tune sounds poorly. The more keys that are broken or out of tune the less likely it is that the tune will be harmonious and pleasant to the ear. The more often that I play the tune with broken keys the less likely I am to keep playing the piano. Or, the more often I experience the cognitive dissonance of not exercising when I planned to the more likely it is that I will stop altogether. I dislike the feelings that cognitive dissonance creates in me.
I can fix this cognitive dissonance, these broken keys, if you will. I can refocus my exercise goals. I can make a new plan that will change the dis-harmony into a melody again. The real problem arises from the vague rules or expectations our society puts upon us. This dissonance is a little harder to deal with. I should have a bigger house, a larger bank account, a newer car. Society and culture puts this out there as the one, right, and true way. I should do all these things to be truly productive or successful. Says who? When society “shoulds” on me I can take it to heart and try to create harmony that has my goals and society’s perceived needs in alignment with one another. Or maybe I should play a different tune that doesn’t need to use those broken keys. Maybe I can create a new music that will be in harmony with the world I want to live in, a world where the “shoulds" of society aren’t getting smeared all over me (go here to see what these people are doing about their “shoulds”… http://www.dailygood.org/more.php?n=3619)
This requires me to re-write my programming. This re-creation of what I want to do, what I want my world to look like will require work on my part. It is easy to do what society says I “should” do…get married, have a career, retire, watch the latest reality TV show, and get the latest gadget. It is a little more challenging to discover your purpose and then live every day into the vision of fulfilling your purpose. Discovering what I am meant to do, who the real me is supposed to be is work boys and girls. The struggle to be unique, to be truly how I am not who I “should” be is worthy of our trip here. Or as e. e. cummings said…”It takes courage to grow up and turn out to be who you really are.”
So…ready to grow up?
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
Join my blog at http://sunday-stories.blogspot.com or find me on Facebook. More stuff coming soon…
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Sunday Story...What's Next
Sunday Story…What’s Next?
I received a comment after last weeks story (go to http://sunday-stories.blogspot.com/ to read it) about what to do next? Basically it went like this…you’re right I have some stuff I have been dragging around that isn’t serving me. But what am I supposed to do about it. It isn’t like I can donate it to Goodwill or just flush it down the toilet! You know what my answer was right? Yes, I went there…I guess you will have to read the next Sunday Story! And here we are.
SO…What’s Next with MY Stuff
Looking around…at My Stuff, I see a number of things that I really need to lose, shift, change or transform. And I see some stuff I really like, stuff I want to keep, stuff that is serving me. Let’s face it, My Stuff is comfortable. I like MY Stuff, after all it is mine! But if you want to get rid of some of your MY Stuff here is a way in 3 easy steps!
Step One: Take a look. Get some perspective and do some introspection. Get really, really honest with yourself. Here is an interesting little exercise…write down 10 things about yourself that you don’t think anyone knows and that you don’t really want people to know. Now, take a look at the list. The things are not important. What is important is WHY you don’t want anyone to know about them. Is it shame, guilt, fear of judgment? Where are those feelings coming from? What is the root of those feelings? That is where your MY Stuff is coming from. When you were 4 years old and you got your hand slapped for some infraction and you created “rule” that has informed your life choices since then. Does that rule really serve you? Really? For instance…When I was about 14 I wrote a poem about death and dying, about water and drowning and how it might feel to be dead. You would have thought I had just written the Communist Manifesto. Counseling, conversations with parents, teachers, etc. all ensued. I decided that telling people what I really felt was not such a good idea. And even deeper than that, I decided that being creative, especially in writing was a really bad idea. This served me in ways over the years. In some ways it served to keep me safe in places where it would have been dangerous to express myself. But the cost was the stifling of creativity that injured my soul every time I did it. SO…not really serving me.
Step Two: Figure out how to re-frame your story. Give people the benefit of the doubt, they are most often doing what they think is right and in your best interest. Create a new story around the event. You can’t change the “what’s so” but you can change the “what’s it mean”. So I was 14 and I wrote something that was provocative (hard to believe, I know) and threatening and scary and yes, I really did wonder what it might be like to drown and be dead. My parents were worried (and rightfully so). They reacted in a way that made sense to them. They did not do it to stifle me, or to create a schism in my psyche. So instead of saying to me that writing and being self expressed is not safe, my story now, is that when I write I elicit strong and powerful reactions in people. My writing is emotional and meaningful and creates a visceral response in my readers. See how much more powerful that story is than the other one. The one that has me running and hiding from my talent? This story empowers me and honors the talent and purpose I am here to fulfill.
Step Three: Give your old story a send off with gratitude and blessings. It served you and kept you over these last few years. Forgive anyone who needs to be forgiven around the event. Love the young you that made the “rules” in the face of incomplete and immature knowledge.
Start doing the thing(s) that your previous rules would not let you do. Take baby steps, be gentle with yourself as you rediscover a part of yourself that has been buried and protected for all this time. A large part of what you are reading these days is a result of this process. 5 years ago this effort would have been impossible. I would not have allowed myself the freedom to expose my thoughts and emotions in this way. By changing my story, by letting go of MY Stuff, I found my voice, my muse that propels me, and I healed that hole in my soul that needs to write and be self expressed.
Are you willing to let go of your stuff in 3 easy steps? There is the blueprint to start re-building the authentic and transparent self the world is waiting for. Pretty simple isn’t it? Here is the small print (no, my attorney didn’t write it!)---this is not an easy process, you will be scraping layers of gunk and debris away from parts of you, parts you have hidden for some time. This may leave you raw and irritated. The people around you might not understand why you are doing this. Side Effects may include soul retrieval, self love, return of playful joy and a childish giggle.
On the other hand…you can keep it the way it is (not!) Look folks; the world is changing, shifting, evolving. We need to find our purpose, the purpose we were put her to do and then live into that purpose. Your job is to live into that purpose. And it is going to be very difficult to do that if you are dragging all those old stories and beliefs around behind you. You get to decide who and what you are. You CAN change the past by changing the story you are telling about it. And you can live into the future the same way. Create your life by creating the stories you tell about it!
Subscribe to my blog at http://sunday-stories.blogspot.com/ . For personal focus coaching, goal setting, physical, nutritional, and emotional transformation, and storytelling contact me at jmariotti@gbis.com.
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
I received a comment after last weeks story (go to http://sunday-stories.blogspot.com/ to read it) about what to do next? Basically it went like this…you’re right I have some stuff I have been dragging around that isn’t serving me. But what am I supposed to do about it. It isn’t like I can donate it to Goodwill or just flush it down the toilet! You know what my answer was right? Yes, I went there…I guess you will have to read the next Sunday Story! And here we are.
SO…What’s Next with MY Stuff
Looking around…at My Stuff, I see a number of things that I really need to lose, shift, change or transform. And I see some stuff I really like, stuff I want to keep, stuff that is serving me. Let’s face it, My Stuff is comfortable. I like MY Stuff, after all it is mine! But if you want to get rid of some of your MY Stuff here is a way in 3 easy steps!
Step One: Take a look. Get some perspective and do some introspection. Get really, really honest with yourself. Here is an interesting little exercise…write down 10 things about yourself that you don’t think anyone knows and that you don’t really want people to know. Now, take a look at the list. The things are not important. What is important is WHY you don’t want anyone to know about them. Is it shame, guilt, fear of judgment? Where are those feelings coming from? What is the root of those feelings? That is where your MY Stuff is coming from. When you were 4 years old and you got your hand slapped for some infraction and you created “rule” that has informed your life choices since then. Does that rule really serve you? Really? For instance…When I was about 14 I wrote a poem about death and dying, about water and drowning and how it might feel to be dead. You would have thought I had just written the Communist Manifesto. Counseling, conversations with parents, teachers, etc. all ensued. I decided that telling people what I really felt was not such a good idea. And even deeper than that, I decided that being creative, especially in writing was a really bad idea. This served me in ways over the years. In some ways it served to keep me safe in places where it would have been dangerous to express myself. But the cost was the stifling of creativity that injured my soul every time I did it. SO…not really serving me.
Step Two: Figure out how to re-frame your story. Give people the benefit of the doubt, they are most often doing what they think is right and in your best interest. Create a new story around the event. You can’t change the “what’s so” but you can change the “what’s it mean”. So I was 14 and I wrote something that was provocative (hard to believe, I know) and threatening and scary and yes, I really did wonder what it might be like to drown and be dead. My parents were worried (and rightfully so). They reacted in a way that made sense to them. They did not do it to stifle me, or to create a schism in my psyche. So instead of saying to me that writing and being self expressed is not safe, my story now, is that when I write I elicit strong and powerful reactions in people. My writing is emotional and meaningful and creates a visceral response in my readers. See how much more powerful that story is than the other one. The one that has me running and hiding from my talent? This story empowers me and honors the talent and purpose I am here to fulfill.
Step Three: Give your old story a send off with gratitude and blessings. It served you and kept you over these last few years. Forgive anyone who needs to be forgiven around the event. Love the young you that made the “rules” in the face of incomplete and immature knowledge.
Start doing the thing(s) that your previous rules would not let you do. Take baby steps, be gentle with yourself as you rediscover a part of yourself that has been buried and protected for all this time. A large part of what you are reading these days is a result of this process. 5 years ago this effort would have been impossible. I would not have allowed myself the freedom to expose my thoughts and emotions in this way. By changing my story, by letting go of MY Stuff, I found my voice, my muse that propels me, and I healed that hole in my soul that needs to write and be self expressed.
Are you willing to let go of your stuff in 3 easy steps? There is the blueprint to start re-building the authentic and transparent self the world is waiting for. Pretty simple isn’t it? Here is the small print (no, my attorney didn’t write it!)---this is not an easy process, you will be scraping layers of gunk and debris away from parts of you, parts you have hidden for some time. This may leave you raw and irritated. The people around you might not understand why you are doing this. Side Effects may include soul retrieval, self love, return of playful joy and a childish giggle.
On the other hand…you can keep it the way it is (not!) Look folks; the world is changing, shifting, evolving. We need to find our purpose, the purpose we were put her to do and then live into that purpose. Your job is to live into that purpose. And it is going to be very difficult to do that if you are dragging all those old stories and beliefs around behind you. You get to decide who and what you are. You CAN change the past by changing the story you are telling about it. And you can live into the future the same way. Create your life by creating the stories you tell about it!
Subscribe to my blog at http://sunday-stories.blogspot.com/ . For personal focus coaching, goal setting, physical, nutritional, and emotional transformation, and storytelling contact me at jmariotti@gbis.com.
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
Saturday, February 7, 2009
Sunday Story…Progress
Get to the bottom of this!
Lately, we have been inundated with interesting economic news. Disaster after disaster looms. And not just here…the entire world seems to be in turmoil, economically. I just heard from someone in Europe recently who said and I quote: “I am a bit gutted but I work for the higher end of the business and bookings are low yada yada recession blah blah blah…” The Chinese this, the Indians that, Bonuses for Bankers, Wall Street continues. We need growth, economic growth to continue to fuel our lives. BUT WAIT there’s more…it sounds like Ron Popeil hawking the next great fishing thing or a cook set all coming with that really cool ginsu knife that cuts cans and tomatoes and stays sharp all the time!
We are in trouble as a society and a culture. And we are trying to solve our problems with the same level of thinking that created them. No offense to our new president but putting a new wrapper on an old idea is like wrapping old fish in new newspaper. Looks good, still stinks. And it is not going to solve the problem long term. How about we do some 180 degree turns? Since you cannot have peace while preparing for war…let cancel the Department of Defense and start the Department of Peace. Instead of the consumer price index, let’s have the consumer happiness index. When it goes up we all benefit! Cancel public works in favor of good works. Instead of bailing out businesses lets educate our children to solve problems instead of taking tests. Federal Bureau of Investigation becomes the Federal bureau of Instigation…how can we instigate new ideas and thinking? Central Intelligence Agency? How about an Emotional Intelligence Agency? Department of Commerce? Maybe Department of Character? Department of the Interior….OK, but only if the Interior refers to the landscape of my soul. Hmmmm…Homeland Security? Maybe Global Security? How about the Surgeon General? You have got to be kidding…no wonder our healthcare is a mess…Maybe we should have a Minister of Health? A department where our health is paramount not our sickness. A Department of Restorative Justice rather than the Department of regular old justice. And we need a Department of Mediation and Reconciliation instead of the Department of Corrections. Internal Revenue? How about a little External Revenue? Attorney General? Czars of this or that? Fighting the war on drugs, poverty, and crime? Maybe we should declare the war over. Stop the bellicose talk and begin the peace talks. Quit naming departments and their heads after out dated martial systems. It isn’t working folks. It is broken. All our efforts to fight this and that epidemic of badness have failed to eradicate it. Oh it changes a little from time to time but really it has not changed.
I am tired of constantly hearing about growth…growing jobs, growing the economy, growing green technology. I want progress. I want to hear about companies that are progressing with their communities through partnerships with people instead of lip service about giving money away while not providing benefits and caring for their employees. I want government to be about people instead of things…like bombs and planes, and humvees. I want government to be progressive about changing the landscape of our minds and souls interior instead mining our mountains, rivers, and valleys.
We have grown. Our population has increased. Our GDP is larger. Lots of things have grown but have we progressed? Do we only measure progress by the size of our Gross Domestic Product? By the size of our revenue stream? Whether or not we have a trade deficit, a balanced budget or a peace hinged on mutually assured destruction? We have traversed into bizarro world. Maybe we should look at the least of us…the elderly, the children, the homeless, the sick, the tired, and the poor. How are they progressing? Are their lives getting any easier? And don’t start the “pull themselves up by the boot straps” conversation. People are living in the canyons west of where I live and other people are mad because “Those People” don’t have any way to dispose of their trash and waste? Shouldn’t we be mad about the fact that they don’t have a place to live? Shouldn’t we, as a society, as a community, want to help those around us who can’t help themselves? This is not progress folks.
Progress is when the least of us is cared for and loved. Can you look at that homeless man and see the little boy he once was? Running playing, hoping and dreaming? Or do you see your own fear and loathing? “Oh God not again. Don’t THESE PEOPLE know any better? Why doesn’t he get a job?” Progress is when our communities are clean and well cared for. Where people can live sustainably, be happy and grow up and old together. Progress is not just when I get to worship the way I want to but when you get to worship your way right next to me and we both smile. Progress is when the elderly are respected as wisdom keepers and the link between generations; their stories are carried forth as learning tools. Progress is when no child goes to bed hungry, scared or in pain. Progress is when a helping hand is there to teach and create an environment of health and healing. Progress means we are becoming the human “being”. Progress meant the entire planet belongs to the family and the family is all of us. Progress is when the Power of Love is more important the love of power (Thanks Jimi).
Oh and by the way…Happy Valentine’s Day…send some love to someone you have a hard time loving.
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
Get to the bottom of this!
Lately, we have been inundated with interesting economic news. Disaster after disaster looms. And not just here…the entire world seems to be in turmoil, economically. I just heard from someone in Europe recently who said and I quote: “I am a bit gutted but I work for the higher end of the business and bookings are low yada yada recession blah blah blah…” The Chinese this, the Indians that, Bonuses for Bankers, Wall Street continues. We need growth, economic growth to continue to fuel our lives. BUT WAIT there’s more…it sounds like Ron Popeil hawking the next great fishing thing or a cook set all coming with that really cool ginsu knife that cuts cans and tomatoes and stays sharp all the time!
We are in trouble as a society and a culture. And we are trying to solve our problems with the same level of thinking that created them. No offense to our new president but putting a new wrapper on an old idea is like wrapping old fish in new newspaper. Looks good, still stinks. And it is not going to solve the problem long term. How about we do some 180 degree turns? Since you cannot have peace while preparing for war…let cancel the Department of Defense and start the Department of Peace. Instead of the consumer price index, let’s have the consumer happiness index. When it goes up we all benefit! Cancel public works in favor of good works. Instead of bailing out businesses lets educate our children to solve problems instead of taking tests. Federal Bureau of Investigation becomes the Federal bureau of Instigation…how can we instigate new ideas and thinking? Central Intelligence Agency? How about an Emotional Intelligence Agency? Department of Commerce? Maybe Department of Character? Department of the Interior….OK, but only if the Interior refers to the landscape of my soul. Hmmmm…Homeland Security? Maybe Global Security? How about the Surgeon General? You have got to be kidding…no wonder our healthcare is a mess…Maybe we should have a Minister of Health? A department where our health is paramount not our sickness. A Department of Restorative Justice rather than the Department of regular old justice. And we need a Department of Mediation and Reconciliation instead of the Department of Corrections. Internal Revenue? How about a little External Revenue? Attorney General? Czars of this or that? Fighting the war on drugs, poverty, and crime? Maybe we should declare the war over. Stop the bellicose talk and begin the peace talks. Quit naming departments and their heads after out dated martial systems. It isn’t working folks. It is broken. All our efforts to fight this and that epidemic of badness have failed to eradicate it. Oh it changes a little from time to time but really it has not changed.
I am tired of constantly hearing about growth…growing jobs, growing the economy, growing green technology. I want progress. I want to hear about companies that are progressing with their communities through partnerships with people instead of lip service about giving money away while not providing benefits and caring for their employees. I want government to be about people instead of things…like bombs and planes, and humvees. I want government to be progressive about changing the landscape of our minds and souls interior instead mining our mountains, rivers, and valleys.
We have grown. Our population has increased. Our GDP is larger. Lots of things have grown but have we progressed? Do we only measure progress by the size of our Gross Domestic Product? By the size of our revenue stream? Whether or not we have a trade deficit, a balanced budget or a peace hinged on mutually assured destruction? We have traversed into bizarro world. Maybe we should look at the least of us…the elderly, the children, the homeless, the sick, the tired, and the poor. How are they progressing? Are their lives getting any easier? And don’t start the “pull themselves up by the boot straps” conversation. People are living in the canyons west of where I live and other people are mad because “Those People” don’t have any way to dispose of their trash and waste? Shouldn’t we be mad about the fact that they don’t have a place to live? Shouldn’t we, as a society, as a community, want to help those around us who can’t help themselves? This is not progress folks.
Progress is when the least of us is cared for and loved. Can you look at that homeless man and see the little boy he once was? Running playing, hoping and dreaming? Or do you see your own fear and loathing? “Oh God not again. Don’t THESE PEOPLE know any better? Why doesn’t he get a job?” Progress is when our communities are clean and well cared for. Where people can live sustainably, be happy and grow up and old together. Progress is not just when I get to worship the way I want to but when you get to worship your way right next to me and we both smile. Progress is when the elderly are respected as wisdom keepers and the link between generations; their stories are carried forth as learning tools. Progress is when no child goes to bed hungry, scared or in pain. Progress is when a helping hand is there to teach and create an environment of health and healing. Progress means we are becoming the human “being”. Progress meant the entire planet belongs to the family and the family is all of us. Progress is when the Power of Love is more important the love of power (Thanks Jimi).
Oh and by the way…Happy Valentine’s Day…send some love to someone you have a hard time loving.
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Sunday Story...Journaling
Sunday Story…Journaling
About 6 months ago a friend came to me and said “you should write the Sunday story yourself. “ Thus began the genesis of what you are reading today. Before that I would scour the web for some inspirational story or something to comment on and share it with all of you. Now after a little push, I write, every week, a story designed to inspire each and every one of you. Sometimes I try to touch you emotionally, or get you to thinking a little out of the box, or even motivate you to action on some level. This is my mission…to inspire transformation. These stories are my journal of that effort.
In almost every personal growth book or program I have read or undertaken there is invariably a request to “journal”. Many people find this requirement to be the most difficult part of any process. Why is that? After all, just write a few words on paper and you are done. When I was participating in The Ultimate Black Belt Test 3 a few years ago we were required to journal every week. It was difficult for me and many of my team mates. There is always an excuse, a reason it did not get done. Everything from…I forgot, I don’t have anything to say, I can’t type, I don’t write well, to No one cares what I have to say, my words don’t matter, and It’s too hard. Yep, got it. All those things are great reasons not to do it.
AND there is one over-riding reason to do it and do it faithfully. Yes, it will provide a record, a chronicle of your journey. Yes, it will help you keep the project at the front of your mind. BUT the single most reason for you to journal at least weekly is…YOU WILL TRANSFORM YOUR THINKING. And, you may ask, why is that important? It so simple really…THE WAY YOU THINK INFORMS, MOVES, AND SHAPES YOUR ENTIRE LIFE!!!!!
Right now we are doing the first ever Relentless Fitness Challenge. Each participant is required to keep a food journal. Everything you eat and drink every day for a week. This changes how you think about your food. It forces more intentionality around your food choices. A very good practice and the first step to growing into the optimum health we all desire. I have found this part of the project very difficult. Yet it is very revealing about my eating habits. Thus my mind is shifting.
As part of another process I am participating in, I write down 10 things that I did every day. Yes, there is a record of how I spent my time and what I accomplished, but even more important it forces me to look and ask if what I am doing is serving my mission and vision. Do my activities feed my larger mission? All too often at the end of the day we ask “what exactly did I do? What did I accomplish today?”
I sincerely believe we were put here, now, to evolve our soul. As part of that evolution, I need to discover my purpose. I want to live a life OF purpose ON purpose. If I live my purpose I will be doing the work I was put here to do. Journaling is part of discovering your purpose. When I change my mind I change my life!
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
PS. If you remember last week’s story about being green…here is a video of some “urban homesteaders” in Pasadena California. I wonder if there isn’t some of this we can’t do now in our own lives? The link is here:
http://video.nytimes.com/video/2008/04/18/magazine/1194817108584/life-mostly-off-the-grid.html
About 6 months ago a friend came to me and said “you should write the Sunday story yourself. “ Thus began the genesis of what you are reading today. Before that I would scour the web for some inspirational story or something to comment on and share it with all of you. Now after a little push, I write, every week, a story designed to inspire each and every one of you. Sometimes I try to touch you emotionally, or get you to thinking a little out of the box, or even motivate you to action on some level. This is my mission…to inspire transformation. These stories are my journal of that effort.
In almost every personal growth book or program I have read or undertaken there is invariably a request to “journal”. Many people find this requirement to be the most difficult part of any process. Why is that? After all, just write a few words on paper and you are done. When I was participating in The Ultimate Black Belt Test 3 a few years ago we were required to journal every week. It was difficult for me and many of my team mates. There is always an excuse, a reason it did not get done. Everything from…I forgot, I don’t have anything to say, I can’t type, I don’t write well, to No one cares what I have to say, my words don’t matter, and It’s too hard. Yep, got it. All those things are great reasons not to do it.
AND there is one over-riding reason to do it and do it faithfully. Yes, it will provide a record, a chronicle of your journey. Yes, it will help you keep the project at the front of your mind. BUT the single most reason for you to journal at least weekly is…YOU WILL TRANSFORM YOUR THINKING. And, you may ask, why is that important? It so simple really…THE WAY YOU THINK INFORMS, MOVES, AND SHAPES YOUR ENTIRE LIFE!!!!!
Right now we are doing the first ever Relentless Fitness Challenge. Each participant is required to keep a food journal. Everything you eat and drink every day for a week. This changes how you think about your food. It forces more intentionality around your food choices. A very good practice and the first step to growing into the optimum health we all desire. I have found this part of the project very difficult. Yet it is very revealing about my eating habits. Thus my mind is shifting.
As part of another process I am participating in, I write down 10 things that I did every day. Yes, there is a record of how I spent my time and what I accomplished, but even more important it forces me to look and ask if what I am doing is serving my mission and vision. Do my activities feed my larger mission? All too often at the end of the day we ask “what exactly did I do? What did I accomplish today?”
I sincerely believe we were put here, now, to evolve our soul. As part of that evolution, I need to discover my purpose. I want to live a life OF purpose ON purpose. If I live my purpose I will be doing the work I was put here to do. Journaling is part of discovering your purpose. When I change my mind I change my life!
Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
PS. If you remember last week’s story about being green…here is a video of some “urban homesteaders” in Pasadena California. I wonder if there isn’t some of this we can’t do now in our own lives? The link is here:
http://video.nytimes.com/video/2008/04/18/magazine/1194817108584/life-mostly-off-the-grid.html
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)