Sunday Story...Define Yourself

It seems to me there is a very important choice we all make every day.
Are you defining yourself?
Or
Are you letting the world define you?
Everything you do every day makes a clear delineation of these two choices. You can allow the world to define you by:
Race
Sex
Gender
Education
Geography
Culture
The clothes you wear, the music you listen to, the hobbies you do
Pick something and the world is going to pigeon-hole you in some way. You are profiling yourself according to the standards you allow the world to put upon you.
You don’t have to accept entrance into that pigeon-hole. You can do what you want according to how you see the world. Not the other way around. You don’t have to wear denim because everyone else does. You should wear clothes that reflect who you are, how you see the world and how you want to express yourself.
You don’t have to go to a certain school or get a particular brand of education. You can go out and get the one that speaks to your soul; you can go to the school that you choose not the one that was chosen for you by birth or circumstances. You don’t have to buckle down to whatever pressure may be applied---peer, group, societal, cultural.

We have heard this advice in so many ways over the years…march to the beat of a different drummer; be your own man; stand for something or you will stand for anything are all platitudes I am sure you have heard over the years.
We tell our children to be strong, to be themselves, to be individuals and then we expect them to be sheeple in school bent over a desk, conforming to the pressure we put on them to perform on standardized tests. But as soon as that’s done go out and make your own mark on the world but just don’t rock the boat.

Rock the boat it that’s what you feel you need to do. Make your mark by living your life with integrity…the integrity that says I am right with myself. I am right in doing this my way because it feeds my soul. It feels right to be one with my passion, one with my calling, one with purpose. I was put here to fulfill a destiny, not a place in line. There is no reason for me to live a mediocre uninspired life. The world does not get to dictate my way of being any more than it gets to dictate how and who I will love.

Be fearless. Be your own super hero to yourself. You can only save yourself from the pressure of mediocrity, or average, of terminal normality. Define yourself and live into your definition.
You can’t fail. You can only learn and grow.

Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
www.martialartsnevada.com

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Sunday Story…Reputation vs. Character

Way too often I hear people talk about someone who is talking about them and how mad they are and wondering what they should do about it. The answer is simple…Do Nothing. Except be who you are, live the way you want to live. You get to define yourself; the opinions of others do not define you. Your reputation is only what others think of you. Your character is who you really are. What you do when no one is watching is who you really are.

Keep working; keep going even in the face of destructive comments and actions. Your reactions define your character. If you remain true to your character, if you stay the course your character compass has set for your life all that negativity will wash over you like water off a ducks back. You do not answer to the opinions of others. Your life serves as an example of your character. Nothing can stop you if you remain true to who you really are. Your character goes with you into your next life; your reputation stays here in this world.

To be a person of character is the goal, not to be a character, or worse a caricature. You get to decide, you get to determine the course of action that will define who you really are. If you don’t determine your character you will always be swayed by the wind of other people’s opinions, which will shift like sand.

Character is something you build over time, over a life. Character determines your destiny. The process looks like this:
Your thoughts create your words.
Your words create your actions.
Your actions create you habits.
Your habits create your character.
And lastly…your Character creates your Destiny.

I leave you with this quote:
The circumstances amid which you live determine your reputation;
the truth you believe determines your character.
Reputation is what you are supposed to be;
Character is what you are.
Reputation is the photograph;
Character is the face.
Reputation comes over one from without;
Character grows up from within.
Reputation is what you have when you come to a new community;
Character is what you have when you go away.
Reputation is made in a moment;
Character is built in a lifetime.
Your reputation is learned in an hour;
Your character doesn't come to light for a year.
Reputation grows like a mushroom;
Character grows like the oak.
A single newspaper report gives you your reputation;
A life of toil gives you your character.
Reputation makes you rich or makes you poor;
Character makes you happy or makes you miserable.
Reputation is what men say about you on your tombstone;
Character is what angels say about you before the throne of God.
~ William Hersey Davis

Don’t confuse reputation and character. They are not the same things.
Be who you are at all times, in the face of every adversity.

Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
www.martialartsnevada.com

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Sunday Story...What are you Waiting for?

I mean, really, what are you waiting for? All around you people are in stasis, not moving at all. People are stuck, and they like being stuck. It is easy and requires us to do nothing. All we have to do is nothing, what could be easier. Just sit on the couch, sit back and let things happen around you. You really can do nothing if you choose it.

On the other hand, once you do something isn’t it almost always easier than you thought? How many times have you put off doing something because it sounded hard, you were afraid you might fail, or you were just flat out scared and then when you went ahead anyway you were amazed at how simple it was?

I had a couple conversations about this just in the last couple days. In one, my friend told me that she would never have tried CrossFit if she had been told what the workout looked like. She said there was no way she would ever have believed that she could do any of those things. Yet several months later she is doing all of them and more. Is it hard? Yes it is. Is it easy? Never. Is it fun? Absolutely. Yet it took that first step into the unknown, that looking under the bed for the monster only to find the monster didn’t exist. Today she rocked 3 different workouts that would have been unheard of 4 months ago.

You have to stop waiting. There is nothing standing in the way except for the self imposed limits you are putting on yourself. You can choose to climb the mountain, jump from the airplane, learn the language, or get a new career. You do not have to accept the status quo. You just need to decide to get out of your own way and get moving toward whatever it is you want to be moving toward. You are not serving yourself by waiting. You are depriving the rest of us, the rest of the world of your greatness, of your effort.

Action is scary. I get it. The height of the rope is scary. The weight on the bar is scary. The workout is scary. Baring your soul is scary. Opening your heart is scary. Living on the edge is scary. I get all of it. But inaction is death. And that is way scarier, isn’t it? Wouldn’t you hate to wake up in the morning and have inaction forced upon your life? Wouldn’t it be a tragedy for all of us not to revel in your effort and your success and learn from your failure? How old will you be next you if you don’t do it now?

The fact is simple: you gain nothing by waiting. There is no prize for procrastinating.
Stop waiting and get moving. Behold the turtle. He gets no where without sticking his neck out!
Stick your neck out and get somewhere!

Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
www.martialartsnevada.com

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Sunday Story...Be Brave

Every day we have an opportunity to “put it out there”. For some of us putting it out there may mean putting our art, our effort out into the public for open viewing. Writing, drawing, painting, speaking, dancing, performing all require a bravery to get into the arena a let the world have a look at our art. We open ourselves to the slings and arrows of criticism; we allow the world to have at our efforts because we are brave.

But how brave am I, really? Because, at the bottom of it, it hurts much more to keep it inside than it will ever hurt to let it out, no matter what the public outcry may be. Keeping my dance locked up hurts my soul. Keeping my words off the paper drives me insane with ideas bouncing off my brain. The images in my head need to get out or the risk of loss is just too high.

I can be afraid of criticism, I can fear ridicule from my peers, and I can be scared that what I am doing is simply not good enough, or too amateur-ish, but I can’t keep it inside…the cost of doing that is too high. The price of keeping my art inside is one of mediocrity. The cost of a life of quiet desperation is to admit failure, to admit that we never tried to be excellent, never tried to be great.

This applies to your life in every arena. The price of poor nutrition is what? The cost of being unfit is what? The expense of not setting goals, not learning new skills, not being better is what? Too damn high if you ask me. The cost of all those things is a life of quiet desperation, a life of terminal mediocrity. Is that who you are? Is that who you want your children to be? I hope we all want more than that from ourselves, for our children…I want excellence in every area. Why would I accept anything less than increasing fitness, outstanding health, and a life full of goals set and met?

We all have fear. We all have a piece of ourselves that wants to be lazy; the part that wants to just sit around and eat junk and do nothing. The part that denies the art that live inside of us that is aching to escape and fly free. Your art might be on a canvas, a page, a dance floor, or a gym mat but it is there nonetheless. Depriving the world of your art is selfish and small. Depriving the rest of us of the shining example of your excellence is criminal.

Put it out there. Don’t try it, do it. Every chance you get, just do it. Pretty soon it will become a habit and the fear will fade and excellence will be ingrained in your psyche.

And that is never going to be a bad thing.

Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
www.martialartsnevada.com

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