Sunday Story...Fear, Pain, and Power

Sunday Story…Fear, Pain, and Power

Fear
What are you afraid of? Really really, wake you up in the middle of night afraid? Fear rules our modern lives in so many ways. We are constantly bombarded by the next disaster or the threat of some attack from some unknown purveyor of death and destruction. Or maybe the next really bad disease that has been discovered. And you should take this pharmaceutical method to fix the disease you probably don’t have and the side effects of the pharmaceutical method just might kill you (but the disease won’t by the way!).
Should you really be afraid of these things? These modern anxiety causing problems that abound and cause you to be less than you are here to be. I think not.
What should you be afraid of? Failure? Success? Public Speaking? Burning Dinner? Those Crazy Hippies? I suppose you get to decide but it seems to me that being afraid of things you can’t do anything about…like the weather, the terrorist threat or unknown diseases is really silly. The things you might have some control over might be sort of OK to be afraid of but not the things you can’t do anything about.

Pain
Pain is inevitable. You are going to stub your toes both physically and metaphorically. You are going to have a broken heart, a business or career setback, and disappointments that may or may not have been avoidable, just to name a few. What you do with that pain is up to you. Many people decide that suffering is the way to go. Suffering is optional. You get to decide whether your pain and suffering goes together. You also get to decide whether fear is going to be pain’s companion.
As humans we are conditioned to move away from pain. If the fire is too hot I move away from it. If you twist my arm in a way that is pain inducing I will move in such a way that the pain will lessen. Yet pain is going to happen.
What should we do about pain? Accept it? Go with it? Rail against it? Run from it? You get to decide but pain is going to happen.

Power
Power is what we get from making decisions about fear and pain. I get power from taking control of my fear. I get power from deciding that pain may be inevitable but suffering is not.
Turning fear into power is one of the most potent processes you will ever experience. The transformation of fear is one of the most exciting alchemical processes known to man. Yet it can only happen when fear is faced and recognized and named. Once I have named my fear I can proceed to transform it into an ally. When fear resides in the shadows it gets dimensions larger than reality. How many times have you seen something in the distance that looked a little scary, a little foreign, and built an entire fear based story around that yet to be revealed thing. And once you realized the thing was nothing the fear vanished. We fear the monster in the closet, the one lurking under the bed, yet once the light comes on there is no monster and the fear goes. At that moment the moment of revelation we are filled with the power of knowing our fear and transforming it.
Transferring pain into power is a similar process. So is turning pain into suffering. Although transferring pain into suffering is a process that requires a lot less effort and strength. When I face my pain, the pain of emotion or physical pain, and when I name my pain, I can begin the process of uniting pain and power.
Both fear and pain can be great motivators. We will change our habits on a dime when faced with death. Smokers quit after 25, 30, or even 40 years of a daily habit when they realize their fear of death is greater than their love of smoking. Emotional pain can drive me into therapy and into personal growth that I would never even attempt without the pain.
These things, fear and pain, are allies and friends. They force me into power if I choose to ally with them. Or I can cower in the corner, defeated before I begin. I can whine and bemoan my plight and suffer through life. Looking deeply into the shadows, casting light on the fear and pain will allow you to live your life, proud and confident, even though you know more pain and fear will arise. You welcome them now, you want the lessons they bring.
Often we see people in love with their pain, in love with the monsters in the closet. These monsters are familiar and in a way comforting. The fear of the unknown…what might happen if I get rid of my favorite monsters …will new ones appear (yes)? Will they be not so friendly (probably in the beginning)? The fear of change is greater than the pleasure that may result from the change, so I stay stuck, mired in my fear and pain, happy in my unhappiness.
To find power in fear, power in pain I must be willing to love them and leave them behind. They served their purpose and now I learn from them and let them go. Will more pain and fear arise? Of course they will. But as we exercise the ability to recognize the lessons fear and pain bring us we can move faster and faster into power until power becomes our default position, not cowering in fear or agonizing about pain.
You’ve got the power. Use it.



Namaste
John
“Teaching Focus, Inspiring Transformation”
www.martialartsnevada.com

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